Well, BP has FINALLY put a permanent stop to that horrible leak!

Oh, no, no, no!

Not the OIL LEAK....the TRUTH LEAK that was coming from Matt Simmons!

So, BP has successfully put an air-tight cap and seal on Matt Simmons...maybe they'll pump drilling mud down his throat now as well.

Screw the relief wells...they got the problem solved the old fashioned way.

The American way.