I swear on your mothers grave this is a true story.

I was walking to my house one warm summer day and my dog was chasing a chipmunk back and forth on the deck railing. I stopped and watched as the damn crazy chipmunk jumped off the end rail of the deck and landed right in front of me with a wump. It got up into a run and right up my fucking leg it ran. I was screaming like a bitch as I kicked my leg to get the chip munkster off.

He flew off my pant leg and ran around me and up the tree. My dummy dog had no clue what was going on cause I was jumpin around and screaming so he just stood there taking it all in.