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Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33861020
United States
02/13/2013 10:10 PM
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Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
For those who don't know how god operates - he does so via electrical current. That's how he searches the hearts and minds - electrical pulses. So that's why you can't fool god, he knows what you're thinking at all times. He knows the intent of your heart. So if you give with the hopes of receiving a reward - he can spot your phoney ass a mile away.

The only advice I can give is to humble yourselves. Give to others with no intent of getting anything in return - and your Father in heaven will reward you. Give in secret - god doesn't like braggers. Give because you want to give. Giving out of obligation is not a gift, it can be cast into the same pile as debt.

Be humble. Put yourself in the shoes of another. Take it upon yourself to actually feel what others feel. Make their struggle your struggle. Realize that "that person" could be you. How about that friend that's sad because he/she got a divorce, why not call them up and offer a shoulder to cry on? How about your mom who's been begging you to put a shelf together for her, but you keep telling her 'soon'. How about that old man struggling to shovel his driveway- how about next time you don't bother to ask, you just wake up early and shovel it anyway.

The rich have their reward...endless and endless piles of paper. That's all money is...paper. Forget money. Offer a helping hand, offer an ear to listen, offer a service or skill you have, offer a ride to someone.

The meek will inherit the earth, now you know why, so there are no excuses.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34362576
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02/13/2013 10:12 PM
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Re: Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
Where do we sign up for the suckers that listen to you? I'll give you my address and sell you a piece of toast that resembles some image of God that you think you know...

PS, if you have any jesus pictures... he wasn't the pasty white guy you see him as...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34352529
United States
02/13/2013 10:14 PM
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Re: Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
I am the poor
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 33861020
United States
02/13/2013 10:22 PM
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Re: Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
Where do we sign up for the suckers that listen to you? I'll give you my address and sell you a piece of toast that resembles some image of God that you think you know...

PS, if you have any jesus pictures... he wasn't the pasty white guy you see him as...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34362576


Where did I say he was a pasty white guy?

I believe I said he operates via electrical current. I don't "think" I know him, I do know him. I've had direct communication with him. Anyone and everyone can when they unite both hemispheres of the brain (ie Ark of the Covenant)...which really is a fancy phrase for magnetic field anyway.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27202787
Australia
02/13/2013 10:24 PM
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Re: Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
I am the poor
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34352529


what is it that you are poor in?
CharlieMurphy

User ID: 21085501
United States
02/13/2013 10:26 PM
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Re: Time is almost up...better humble your hearts and give to the poor
Like the Kai the Hitchhiker, Kimmel gave him some money "for the hell of it" and immediately Kai gave it to a bum or something.
Fuck Yea!





GLP