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I cannot believe how lonely I am

 
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 04:57 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
as a mother to four children i have often felt i neeeeeeded a break from their lovely little faces. someone told me that as much as i may need a break from them, they also need a break from me. not that healthy to always be right there....

loneliness just hurts. it hurts. it doesn't matter what your situation is. it just hurts.

good for you for having a marriage that is decent.
good for you for reaching out for contact.
good for you for getting off the meds.
good for you for having a heart that knows we all kind of need each other here.

it's true i guess, that the fix is an inside job but with a little help from loving others it's that much easier.

best advice i have read on this thread - start to study something meaningful to you. you will come across like-interested others and friendships may form. at any rate you will be expanding your world a little and that will help loosen the doors of agoraphobia some.

great big buckets full of love splashing your way. red_heart
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 04:59 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
I used to be a nice guy, a team player, Captain Chivalry and everyone's friend. I got kicked, used, shit on, beaten, cheated on and thrown away. I am the polar opposite of who I was my whole life. I am what happens to the 'good guy' when he's all used up. I don't want to be this person but then again I didn't ask for cancer, glaucoma and to be abandoned by everyone and everything I loved. Que Sera, Sera I guess.

But hey, thanks for being an anonymous judgmental dick about it anyway.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 24951761


yeah, I got used like a lucky rabbits foot, too generous, too kind, too forgiving, friends would agree to meet me at a cafe then (cos they'd pre planned it) they'd run off without paying, leaving me sitting there - sometimes that works out though, the chef asked me for their phone numbers and addresses, which I was happy to give, ha. That didn't stop 'em though, I simply must exist for their use and convenience, it got quite bizarre, had to wise up and stop being the nice person, they just walk all over you. I aint' 'nice' anymore, but I can't say it's stopped, I just stopped having much to do with people other than the coupla minutes at the cash register. It's important to know and understand the basic socipath profile.
desa'layta

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03/19/2013 05:01 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
hugs You're never alone here, holldoll :).
 Quoting: LaniJane

yep. glp is my only social life. works pretty good for me.
howdy
GreenTabasco

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Taiwan
03/19/2013 05:02 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
u2efineu2efineflowerflower
Your day will come...
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:04 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up. I had a smile on my face the whole time, but the problems never changed, they were never fixed and here I am years later still facing the same issues. I didn't fix them, I prolonged them. Perhaps now I'll be stronger facing them than before??

For example, I've been a stay at home mom now for 12 years of my life. I'm only just now realizing that I'm lonely. My husband is a great guy, he's wonderful..but he's my only adult friend. Going out is a struggle for me, since as a child my mother was gone all the time, I made a promise to myself and my children that I would always be the kind of mom that was there for them. I've held true to them, but at what cost, and I think to myself..my own sanity is worth it for them to have great childhoods they don't have to 'recover' from. I don't want them to ever look back and say, "my mom was selfish". I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just relax, and try to meet people. Even another mom would be nice, someone that I could talk to.

Mostly the problem is that I don't feel normal around other moms, they don't see things the way I do. I've tried joining parenting websites/social networking and it always ends the same..with me looking around and feeling like I just don't understand the minds of these women either. There is only one soul that's ever gotten me, and that's my husband. Maybe I'm just incredibly lucky to have found my one true soul mate. I just don't want to burden him with my sorrows.

I'm lonely, and I don't want to tell him that I need more adult social interaction. Maybe, someone here can give me some advice on how to tell him this.

Also, we don't live near family anymore and when we did, I was still hesitant to let them watch the children. The children are the most precious things to me, and they've only been away from me maybe 2 times a year. I could very well get a nanny or a babysitter, but I am just frightened because no one could ever love my children more than me.
 Quoting: Holldoll


Fuck you lady. I live alone. No friends. Haven't been on a date in 11 years. Love of my life is married to a guy who I wouldn't let wash my car. I DON'T have my health, have panic attacks every other day, haven't been out to a restaurant with anyone, to the movies - anywhere - for over a decade. Lost my job 3 years ago along with all my few work friends. Family only talks to me once a month (I assume to check and see whether or not I'm dead). Spent the best years of my life alone, in an apartment with 2 rooms sleeping alone on a couch fully clothed. I'm 35 and I fucking cry twice a week minimum and that's just the tip of my misery iceberg. For Christ's sake I went an entire fucking week last month and didn't speak to a single person - not an email, not a phone call, not even junk mail. A whole goddamned week. And you're upset because you don't have somebody to go bowling with?

Your husband needs to punch you in your selfish fucking face cunt. Life needs to do to you what it's done to me you selfish, ungrateful asshole.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29910226


^This

Although it probably wasn't put out there in the best way, there is truth to it. There are people out there with nobody, not even their own health. As bad as things can feel, they can always be worse.

You have your family, that is huge. Some people have nobody at all! Try rediscovering your love for your husband, and doing things that you used to do with him. Go out with him every now and then, away from the kids. I bet he is feeling just as lonely as you are, and that is NOT a good thing. You need to do something before it is too late!

To the person who replied, I am deeply saddened that you are going through all of that. It sucks to feel abandoned by your family, I hope that you can reconnect with them. Sometimes it takes more effort on your part, but it is worth it to not be alone. Being lonely is not helping your health, you need to find joy in life. I'm not sure what to offer as advice to you, except that I hope that things get better. Take care.
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:15 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Wait until your husband is dead and your children are grown and gone. Then you'll really be lonely. Happened to me. My advise, don't let the children be the center of your life. It is too much to expect from them, and burdens them emotionally. You should develop your own interests and the friends will develop along with them.
Anonymous Coward
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Spain
03/19/2013 05:16 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Ive been alone op but I cant remember feeling lonely ever.
Feeling lonely or not hasnt much to do with being around other people or not I think, its a state of mind and spirit. If you try to enrich your interior life even more I think you will feel fulfilled. And instead of reaching out to other to recieve..you will reach out to others..to give..which is what its all about anyway I think
hf
PPP

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03/19/2013 05:18 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Find a part-time job.
The interaction with others will be good for you.

If you don't get out there now...
The feelings of lonliness will increase.
Especially when your children have grown.
 Quoting: Venus Goddess


That really helped me, to have a job...
Made me feel useful and forced me to meet the same people regularly

Keep confident and positive about what you want
It could appear in a manner you didn't expect
But maybe you should consider your needs as FP said...

Anyway... You're a good soul and deserve to be happy

.
Anonymous Coward
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Spain
03/19/2013 05:21 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Whenever I am alone..unless I am busy with something or relaxing ..I am speaking to God , the Blessed Mother and or the Saints with the belief that they can hear, op please try this hf it is so enriching..its such a wonderful experience.
To waste the time when you are physically alone or feel it ..is such a pity because you can grow spiritually in so so many ways I believe
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 05:23 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
OP I have cancer Im 38 years old , Im probably not going to make it! I feel very alone to. I can realy relate to what you said about being alone? You realy have to watch it on GLP throwing your heart out there because poeple blow up and say? F - you Im in more pain, lol! Relax folks! Ive related to two things in my life! " Liberty" and Freedom" that is all! Most Americans are full retards and not worth talking to so dont worry ! Most " awake" poeple have know one to talk to except God! My advice talk to your husband , give him a hug and say buddy? I need you theres stuff going on and I need help! Cherish the moment you have with your loved ones for in one hour it is gone...........I will die alone and that is very sad , I never found love or always rejected it? I am the waring type and find trouble often , even in death I cant keep my mouth shut! My family always hated me because I told the truth ? Thats ok , Im the one who is going to die free................
goodmockingbird

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03/19/2013 05:24 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up.
 Quoting: Holldoll


The meds kept your brain chemistry artificially conditioned so that it could not produce its own "feel good" chemicals.

It will take a while, months perhaps, before you will become able to stabilise your own internal chemistry -- naturally.

Congratulations on getting off the meds.

A couple of the best things you can do for yourself are join a gym to work out, and get outdoors to walk, jog, run or hike.

Physical excercise and outdoor time can cure an incredible range of human discontent.

A gym -- and joining some aerobics classes, things like that -- will give you social interaction with women, and the outdoors just naturally heals.
I Support Our First Responders
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 05:30 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up.
 Quoting: Holldoll


The meds kept your brain chemistry artificially conditioned so that it could not produce its own "feel good" chemicals.

It will take a while, months perhaps, before you will become able to stabilise your own internal chemistry -- naturally.

Congratulations on getting off the meds.

A couple of the best things you can do for yourself are join a gym to work out, and get outdoors to walk, jog, run or hike.

Physical excercise and outdoor time can cure an incredible range of human discontent.

A gym -- and joining some aerobics classes, things like that -- will give you social interaction with women, and the outdoors just naturally heals.
 Quoting: goodmockingbird



^^^^^^there you go OP! Very good advice!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 05:31 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
bump
Apocalypse Troll
Trollicus Apocalyptus

User ID: 19827255
United States
03/19/2013 05:31 AM

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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up. I had a smile on my face the whole time, but the problems never changed, they were never fixed and here I am years later still facing the same issues. I didn't fix them, I prolonged them. Perhaps now I'll be stronger facing them than before??

For example, I've been a stay at home mom now for 12 years of my life. I'm only just now realizing that I'm lonely. My husband is a great guy, he's wonderful..but he's my only adult friend. Going out is a struggle for me, since as a child my mother was gone all the time, I made a promise to myself and my children that I would always be the kind of mom that was there for them. I've held true to them, but at what cost, and I think to myself..my own sanity is worth it for them to have great childhoods they don't have to 'recover' from. I don't want them to ever look back and say, "my mom was selfish". I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just relax, and try to meet people. Even another mom would be nice, someone that I could talk to.

Mostly the problem is that I don't feel normal around other moms, they don't see things the way I do. I've tried joining parenting websites/social networking and it always ends the same..with me looking around and feeling like I just don't understand the minds of these women either. There is only one soul that's ever gotten me, and that's my husband. Maybe I'm just incredibly lucky to have found my one true soul mate. I just don't want to burden him with my sorrows.

I'm lonely, and I don't want to tell him that I need more adult social interaction. Maybe, someone here can give me some advice on how to tell him this.

Also, we don't live near family anymore and when we did, I was still hesitant to let them watch the children. The children are the most precious things to me, and they've only been away from me maybe 2 times a year. I could very well get a nanny or a babysitter, but I am just frightened because no one could ever love my children more than me.
 Quoting: Holldoll


Fuck you lady. I live alone. No friends. Haven't been on a date in 11 years. Love of my life is married to a guy who I wouldn't let wash my car. I DON'T have my health, have panic attacks every other day, haven't been out to a restaurant with anyone, to the movies - anywhere - for over a decade. Lost my job 3 years ago along with all my few work friends. Family only talks to me once a month (I assume to check and see whether or not I'm dead). Spent the best years of my life alone, in an apartment with 2 rooms sleeping alone on a couch fully clothed. I'm 35 and I fucking cry twice a week minimum and that's just the tip of my misery iceberg. For Christ's sake I went an entire fucking week last month and didn't speak to a single person - not an email, not a phone call, not even junk mail. A whole goddamned week. And you're upset because you don't have somebody to go bowling with?

Your husband needs to punch you in your selfish fucking face cunt. Life needs to do to you what it's done to me you selfish, ungrateful asshole.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29910226


I'm starting to see why you're single.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 36478015


I used to be a nice guy, a team player, Captain Chivalry and everyone's friend. I got kicked, used, shit on, beaten, cheated on and thrown away. I am the polar opposite of who I was my whole life. I am what happens to the 'good guy' when he's all used up. I don't want to be this person but then again I didn't ask for cancer, glaucoma and to be abandoned by everyone and everything I loved. Que Sera, Sera I guess.

But hey, thanks for being an anonymous judgmental dick about it anyway.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 24951761



potkettle


To the OP - Perhaps try to learn an instrument, or two or three?

Classical guitar, violin and piano are frighteningly difficult to learn correctly. I find myself lost practice for hours sometimes, as if I had been floating at the bottom of some incredibly deep, serene lake.

You can get personal interactions with teachers, which is a rather solidly defined relationship, and perhaps branch out from there to other music lovers/performers.
attxflag
"Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one and indivisible."

[link to www.statutes.legis.state.tx.us]
Anonymous Coward
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Italy
03/19/2013 05:37 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
OP, so you are saying you have two kids but also that you are lonely? how does that work?

something seems off here..
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:38 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
31444777 - anonymous coward -

I LOVE YOU!blwkss
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 05:41 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Sounds like the crimson tide is due. You'll be fine in a couple days.

Meanwhile, get yourself a hobby. Start jogging. Write a children's book. Get out of the rut.

Or if you're a modern femenist you could go to a bar, enlist yourself in a 30 dude unprotected gangbang and film it. Then rob your husband of years of hard work while destroying your children's lives in a bitter divorce.

Or just get a hobby.
morphic oceans
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United Kingdom
03/19/2013 05:41 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
I've been In The Same Shoes For Ten Years And Can't Figure Out How To Fix It. I Dont Feel Like I Belong Here.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 36198255


Yes exactly, It's a feeling of not belonging. I've tried churches, playgrounds, and even went to a bar for the first time in my life just last year. None of them felt right. I went to a concert for the first time in my life as well, and while it was fun, I felt like I was in a dream.
 Quoting: Holldoll


It seems like the sensation of not being attached. Could be anxiety or depression. Find somebody to talk to.

Peace.
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:42 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
31444777 - anonymous coward -

I LOVE YOU!blwkss
 Quoting: octobersolstice


I love you to..............hf
daisy
User ID: 34495736
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03/19/2013 05:45 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up. I had a smile on my face the whole time, but the problems never changed, they were never fixed and here I am years later still facing the same issues. I didn't fix them, I prolonged them. Perhaps now I'll be stronger facing them than before??

For example, I've been a stay at home mom now for 12 years of my life. I'm only just now realizing that I'm lonely. My husband is a great guy, he's wonderful..but he's my only adult friend. Going out is a struggle for me, since as a child my mother was gone all the time, I made a promise to myself and my children that I would always be the kind of mom that was there for them. I've held true to them, but at what cost, and I think to myself..my own sanity is worth it for them to have great childhoods they don't have to 'recover' from. I don't want them to ever look back and say, "my mom was selfish". I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just relax, and try to meet people. Even another mom would be nice, someone that I could talk to.

Mostly the problem is that I don't feel normal around other moms, they don't see things the way I do. I've tried joining parenting websites/social networking and it always ends the same..with me looking around and feeling like I just don't understand the minds of these women either. There is only one soul that's ever gotten me, and that's my husband. Maybe I'm just incredibly lucky to have found my one true soul mate. I just don't want to burden him with my sorrows.

I'm lonely, and I don't want to tell him that I need more adult social interaction. Maybe, someone here can give me some advice on how to tell him this.

Also, we don't live near family anymore and when we did, I was still hesitant to let them watch the children. The children are the most precious things to me, and they've only been away from me maybe 2 times a year. I could very well get a nanny or a babysitter, but I am just frightened because no one could ever love my children more than me.
 Quoting: Holldoll



This is going to sound mean but here goes...

You need to just stop your whining and complaining. You just got off meds? That is going to be a long journey of getting yourself acclimated back to reality. Take it one day at a time and lower your expectations. Turn off the TV. Get outside.

You say you have a husband and are a mom but NEED more social interaction because you are lonely? Do you realize you have far more than most people on here or out in the real world?

STOP feeling sorry for yourself. You need to get an attitude of gratefulness for all that you do have.

Friends are way overrated. It is wonderful when you have them, but they are like seasons of out lives, they come and go and some good ones stick around if we are lucky. It sounds like you are lucky to have the option to BE a stay at home mom, so many moms have to juggle work and raise the kids and some don't even have a husband to help them.

Start counting your blessings instead of counting what you don;t have.

Friends don't pay the mortgage/bills and sometimes they let you down. Focus on your husband, make his life better, by doing so, you will feel better. Be the best mom you can be. Volunteer if you are bored and looking to make more social relationships.

that is all.

flower
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:46 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am


Fuck you lady. I live alone. No friends. Haven't been on a date in 11 years. Love of my life is married to a guy who I wouldn't let wash my car.

 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29910226


I think I see why you've not dated in 11 years. But I can beat you with 20 years and no dating till I met someone online who has turned out to be the love of my life.
Keep trying and stop being so negative. It isn't going to make things easier.
GreenTabasco

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Taiwan
03/19/2013 05:47 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
OP, any of this helpful?
Your day will come...
daisy
User ID: 34495736
United States
03/19/2013 05:50 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
also OP, diet, diet, diet. As a woman, too many animal based products like dairy and red meat will make you lethargic and moody from all the excess hormones pumped into them. I've been vegan for many years, I take no meds and am also a stay at home wife and I could not be happier or feel better. I also work out a lot. I would suggest getting into an activity to boost your physical fitness and thus your overall confidence. Working out is like being on meds, the endorphins released make you fee wonderful and there are lots of women's work out clubs or running clubs that you can join to meet people.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
03/19/2013 05:51 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
She's too lonely to answer.
Anonymous Coward
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03/19/2013 05:57 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up. I had a smile on my face the whole time, but the problems never changed, they were never fixed and here I am years later still facing the same issues. I didn't fix them, I prolonged them. Perhaps now I'll be stronger facing them than before??

For example, I've been a stay at home mom now for 12 years of my life. I'm only just now realizing that I'm lonely. My husband is a great guy, he's wonderful..but he's my only adult friend. Going out is a struggle for me, since as a child my mother was gone all the time, I made a promise to myself and my children that I would always be the kind of mom that was there for them. I've held true to them, but at what cost, and I think to myself..my own sanity is worth it for them to have great childhoods they don't have to 'recover' from. I don't want them to ever look back and say, "my mom was selfish". I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just relax, and try to meet people. Even another mom would be nice, someone that I could talk to.

Mostly the problem is that I don't feel normal around other moms, they don't see things the way I do. I've tried joining parenting websites/social networking and it always ends the same..with me looking around and feeling like I just don't understand the minds of these women either. There is only one soul that's ever gotten me, and that's my husband. Maybe I'm just incredibly lucky to have found my one true soul mate. I just don't want to burden him with my sorrows.

I'm lonely, and I don't want to tell him that I need more adult social interaction. Maybe, someone here can give me some advice on how to tell him this.

Also, we don't live near family anymore and when we did, I was still hesitant to let them watch the children. The children are the most precious things to me, and they've only been away from me maybe 2 times a year. I could very well get a nanny or a babysitter, but I am just frightened because no one could ever love my children more than me.
 Quoting: Holldoll


Fuck you lady. I live alone. No friends. Haven't been on a date in 11 years. Love of my life is married to a guy who I wouldn't let wash my car. I DON'T have my health, have panic attacks every other day, haven't been out to a restaurant with anyone, to the movies - anywhere - for over a decade. Lost my job 3 years ago along with all my few work friends. Family only talks to me once a month (I assume to check and see whether or not I'm dead). Spent the best years of my life alone, in an apartment with 2 rooms sleeping alone on a couch fully clothed. I'm 35 and I fucking cry twice a week minimum and that's just the tip of my misery iceberg. For Christ's sake I went an entire fucking week last month and didn't speak to a single person - not an email, not a phone call, not even junk mail. A whole goddamned week. And you're upset because you don't have somebody to go bowling with?

Your husband needs to punch you in your selfish fucking face cunt. Life needs to do to you what it's done to me you selfish, ungrateful asshole.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29910226

I wouldnt have said it this harshly, but I do agree with most of this. the OP needs to get over herself and realize how much she actually HAS> if she is lonely, that is a very EASY fix compared to what others suffer.
daisy
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03/19/2013 05:58 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
I just read all the posts here and got sad. I know so many of you are lonely and hurting.

I love you all. We are not here for long. Hang in there.

hf
Anonymous Coward
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Canada
03/19/2013 06:15 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
Sharpen pencils...
Ibrahim

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United Kingdom
03/19/2013 06:20 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
You are crazy if you want to be around humans.
All I ever wanted was a husband so I didn't have to go out looking for one all the time.
Now I have one I will have a baby with him and try and segregate myself even further from humanity!
Ibrahim
Freeman Unrestricted

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Netherlands
03/19/2013 06:25 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
At what point are the highs and lows of life too much for one person to handle? I ask this, because I'm recently off all my medication and I find myself over thinking things I haven't thought of in a while. Not necessarily bad things, but things I never really addressed in the first place, those things that the medicine covered up. I had a smile on my face the whole time, but the problems never changed, they were never fixed and here I am years later still facing the same issues. I didn't fix them, I prolonged them. Perhaps now I'll be stronger facing them than before??

For example, I've been a stay at home mom now for 12 years of my life. I'm only just now realizing that I'm lonely. My husband is a great guy, he's wonderful..but he's my only adult friend. Going out is a struggle for me, since as a child my mother was gone all the time, I made a promise to myself and my children that I would always be the kind of mom that was there for them. I've held true to them, but at what cost, and I think to myself..my own sanity is worth it for them to have great childhoods they don't have to 'recover' from. I don't want them to ever look back and say, "my mom was selfish". I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just relax, and try to meet people. Even another mom would be nice, someone that I could talk to.

Mostly the problem is that I don't feel normal around other moms, they don't see things the way I do. I've tried joining parenting websites/social networking and it always ends the same..with me looking around and feeling like I just don't understand the minds of these women either. There is only one soul that's ever gotten me, and that's my husband. Maybe I'm just incredibly lucky to have found my one true soul mate. I just don't want to burden him with my sorrows.

I'm lonely, and I don't want to tell him that I need more adult social interaction. Maybe, someone here can give me some advice on how to tell him this.

Also, we don't live near family anymore and when we did, I was still hesitant to let them watch the children. The children are the most precious things to me, and they've only been away from me maybe 2 times a year. I could very well get a nanny or a babysitter, but I am just frightened because no one could ever love my children more than me.
 Quoting: Holldoll


My dear,

Thanks for sharing your insights, your views, your values. It gives peace to you and only you. Understand that you are on a road to become a new person, a whole new person. You are waking up.

Without noticing you did answer all questions related to the perceived negative side which you are addressing. Now you stopped taking medicine, your brain starts to become "normal" again. You start again the normal process of being human and by this you find the perceived void in yourself again and understanding the way you grew up; that was not easy. How do you feel about this, where do you feel this? If you go back to your childhood, was there a moment you felt the love around you, your dad, your uncle, even towards your pet? If you remember this, and feel this, and go deeper in this, making this feeling stronger... Ask yourself the question, do I want to feel this now. Are you feeling this now? Where are you feeling this now... This give you profound happiness...

Is this the same happiness that you are feeling towards your husband, towards your children? Do you feel this bond? What would occur in your life if you feel this same happiness towards others, even people at a store, station, just the people you are passing by when walking? Do you feel this bond or are not NOT feeling a bond? Just ackowledge this in your feeling.

What would occur if the promiss you held up is no longer necessary in this life... What would happen if you say to a stranger "hello"? Ask yourself the question "Is there anything I can give for free, whitout making a promiss to myself?" What would happen if I can give this for free without wanting anything from anybody, anywhere...

Imagine you are 93 years old and you look back to your life. Are you still lonely? What would you say to this woman, you standing or sitting there? What does she really need, say it loud, scream it loud out. What is she in need off. What advice can you give to this woman living now?

Are you crying, are you laughing to the answer you give? Go forth from this, look around you, you ARE creative in finding, even you are creative in finding you soul purpose in this life. Whether you like it or not you are know cathing up with your true purpose in life, from here on you will find new roads, new things to do with a smile you always had, a smile which you where originally born with... A feeling only known to you, you can share with anybody, anywhere in this world!

hf
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03/19/2013 06:26 AM
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Re: I cannot believe how lonely I am
You´re a lovely soul.
You just have to let go of try to get a hold on people, that simply don´t resonate with you.
Most people nowadays are so deep in the state of hypnosis, they´re unable to question anything... even lesser the chance, they understand the true nature of things.
It´s a process, as far as I´ve learned it.
You try to make contact and find good friends, you realize, who cannot be your friends. This serves the one purpose, that you become aware of who you want as a friend..
Then those people can come into your life, I´ve seen this many times. Unfortunately likeminded people are scattered pretty evenly all over the place, here you´ll find some easily, I hope you find some neart to you soon.

Realizing your topics in life is the first step, though it´s painful. Healing is painful most of the times at first.

See, what I did there, I replaced the "n" in lonely with a "v".


hf
 Quoting: Artaius San


What a difference one little letter makes. And how simple the secret is. And there's some good advice given obliquely here: be careful who you choose for your new friends. Really pay attention to what they say vs. what they do. If they are not making sense, or trying to hustle you into doing anything that doesn't feel right, cut your losses before you do anything that you'll regret later. Also, OP, you have the right to shape your own life and it was your decision to sacrifice it for your family. I think you went too far in this and need to pull back some of the control and find a balance. I also suggest that you not be too informational or confrontational with your husband or kids about your private soul journey. Even though you are lonely. I know it's hard but you will get to some truth faster if you look inside yourself.





GLP