My wife of 29yrs just hit me today at dinner time that she wants a divorce!! I'm very sad

I am so sorry. Stay strong and have faith that your life and situation will get better with time. Try figuring out what will help make u happy during this difficult time and build a support system. Don't b afraid to ask for help.

Last Edited by Let Freedom Ring 365 on 05/25/2014 10:48 PM

This will probably make me start another band!

if being married was so great, everybody would be doing it!!!

think about that!

Your marriage may have gotten lost, but your spirit is still there.

29yrs ago when we took our vows I thought it was "Till Death Do Us Part"

Um, yeah... verbal abuse will make her WILD for you.


Okay so you publicly posted her private health issues, not once but twice now. Your lack of decorum must be recognized and corrected. How many times have you embarrassed her to make yourself look the saint?

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope your heart heals quickly.

Thank you I've seen you about as you have probably seen me I only get to get on when I feel up to it.

I'm so sorry!! Been there....except it was my bi-polar husband that simply got up from Thanksgiving dinner one year and left after 25 years of marriage.

from my heart to yours

Thanks for posting OP. This post is another reminder that marriage is bullshit. OP, prepare to bend over.

SSRIs and bipolar do not mix at all, they can make someone bipolar detached and feel unloved, also puts them in an altered state of reality.
And if she was on them and no longer taking them doesn't matter, it will have a lasting affects for years if not treated.
If this is the case she should have her serotonin levels checked, too high is not good, she would need a serotonin blocker.
Look up SSRI and divorce in google.

I don't know who else is like this, but for me, I couldn't care less what someone looks like, what they drive, what their income is or anything else like that. What's on the inside counts...a gentle nature, a caring attitude, someone who helps others, is honest, responsible, and believes the best of others(when it's warranted, that is )...those are the things that count.
There'll be someone out there for you when the time is right...if that's what you want.

Good bro... thanks for asking!

It's good to see that your spirit is still high apparently... that attitude will help greatly.

I've been through divorce myself... and oh man, it sucked.

I hear your pain, BUT, after being verbally abused by a man, for over 20 years, now divorced thank GOD, all I give a damn about are my own feelings and interests...

Not trying to be cold, BUT, my ex-has been a cold son of a bitch, the whole time we were together and the last thing I want to hear after all of my suffering, and emotional pain by a narcissist.

I don't want to hear about yourself or your problems, when I was neglected all that time...do you GET ME?

I have been so burned by men, I no longer care about their feelings, only my own.

No apologies, it's my time now. Done being abused in every possible way, by any more so called men!!

It hurts, when no one gives a shit about your emotions and feelings during a marriage, you become cold yourself!!!

It will take a miracle of GOD, for me to ever trust or ever open up to another man ever again, only GOD can heal my broken heart!!!!!

I never said I was a saint There is a LOT of dirty laundry on both sides of the fence!!!! I have never embarrassed her in public or private all I have ever done is stand by her, make excuses for her, When my youngest daughter asks me "WHY do you put up with her" the answer was there a long time ago. As far as my obvious "lack of decorum" as you so beautifully stated I'll recognize it and tell you how sorry I am to have offended you and yours believe me after this I'll say no more about it now piss off!!!

Not looking forward to that!!!!

First of all, please know we care about you me we are here for you.

Now, let me give you her perspective, kinda. (I have BPD). In HER eyes, you Abandoned her for 6 Months!!! Regardless of whether she agreed to the GA trip or not, You Left Her. So in her eyes, this is your fault.

This might be her way of feeling in control of the situation because you showed up again and disrupted whatever life she cobbled together in her absence.

Especially, if she is an extreme creature of habit, who gets a bit bent out of shape if her daily routine is affected, AND the whole rejection/abandonment thing you did, (regardless if the validity if the reason), she probably has a lot if anger, bitterness and resentment to heap on you.

I suggest u let her vent a bit, (if you do want to reconcile), ask to meet with her and let her fully say whatever she wants. Don't justify, disagree, object, just let her say her peace. Give it some time and maybe things can change.

If these long absences were typical if your relationship, perhaps it's a different story. Regardless, don't use her bipolar disorder as an excuse. If you do, you will just make things worse.

Bet of luck, and I know how hard things are. I m having a lot of marital issues myself. Hope this perspective helps in some way.

I am confused...You left your wife for six months to go fishing?

I feel for you brother. I pray that the Holy Spirit deals with your wife because you are a honest man. I have had to deal with Bi-polar myself in my family. It is not easy to deal with. She will come back and I ask you to ask God to intervene for your wife. When we humble ourselves, only God can overcome. Be blessed.

Just hoping that it will not be messy!!

You need to do something exciting every once in awhile to keep your woman interested. Talk with her and don't act sad while doing it. Say look "her sexy pet name" i know I've been busy for awhile and things have been pretty dull. So we are going to start investing time having fun like we use to. Now you decide what you think she would like to do and what would excite her. Also if you haven't gone down on her in awhile during sex if it gets to that point after going out and doing what you chose to do for your exciting idea. Do IT! Women love to have sex and be eaten out and you'll get more sex out of it too because they will enjoy it more. Nithing worse for a woman than everytime you have sex with her you always do the traditional mish or other traditional positions. Try new things and spice it up. Also go out and do the things she enjoys and you'll have a happy marriage.

That really sucks Op. I feel for you truly. Heartbreak should come with a first aid kit.

If it helps, Mae West said it best when she professed "The best way to get over someone, is to get back under someone."

Good luck friend. Hang tough, stay busy, and this will get easier soon. I promise.

Long story but I took my son south to help him get started I was always coming back at some point. But with our past we needed a little time apart whether it was 6mos or 2yrs

Maybe you shouldn't have broke so many G strings lol . to soon

Really? I don't get how people forget the love they once had for each other? How does it DIE? So no slight flame left in either of you? When we had trouble, 25 yrs here this year, I decided to go to all lengths to salvage our marriage. It worked, we are back on track. I put to much into this family and marriage to start over. I didn't want to start over!!!!

Just to let you know, my repairs started with old photo albums of our life, I pulled them all out and said I was re-doing them which I did. New album covers I bought, he ended up looking at them all out in the open. Next we started reminiscing. That's what helped us, seeing our life's history. All's good today.

Never give up! People who really love each can fall out of love and back into love, marriage is damn hard work. All relationships are and we just go around once on this rock. My vow to my husband was "till death do us part". I meant it!!!

I couldn't agree with you more but I am not looking for any greener pastures when I don't know how much time I've got left

When we were down in Ga getting ready to come back up this is exactly what she said to me Our son can stay with me till you find a place but I cannot worry about what's wrong with or what happens to you even though I was very very ill at the time. I kind of sensed it then

Don't sweat it you will get tons more sex.

Doubt it but only time will tell

Women know fuck all about loyalty.

It's all about me me me.