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Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!

 
Swerve
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User ID: 58793078
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12/16/2014 05:13 PM
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Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!

Today is the beginning of the eight-day "festival of light" that begins on
the eve of the 25th of the Jewish month of Kislev -- which celebrates the triumph
of light over darkness, of purity over adulteration, of spirituality over
materiality.

21+ centuries ago, the Holy Land was ruled by the Syrian-Greeks who sought
to forcefully Hellenize the people of Israel. Against all odds, a small
band of faithful Jews opened a can of whoop-ass on one of the mightiest
armies on earth, forced the Greeks from the land and reclaimed the Holy
Temple in Jerusalem. Soon there after it was rededicated to the service of
God.

When the Jews sought to light the Temple's multi-branched menorah, they
found only a one day supply of oil. By God's grace, that one day supply
burned for 8 days, allowing a new supply of ritually pure oil to be made.

As with most Jewish holidays, Hanukkah follows a common celebratory pattern:

They tried to kill us,
We survived,
Lets eat!


Hanukkah is also a time a family gatherings, gift giving and sumptuous
meals. It is also a time of spiritual reflection, reconciliation and the
expression of tremendous gratitude to God for sustaining the Jewish people,
yet again, from what would appear to be insurmountable challenges.

To all of my Jewish friends, there are many on GLP who celebrate with you
and your families in this time.

.

Last Edited by Swerve on 12/16/2014 05:15 PM
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:14 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
I just farted
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:16 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
The Festival of Lucifer...er, I mean "light". Ya, that's the ticket...light.
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:16 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
I just farted
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 66120287


OMG don't be mean to Jews.

I like Jews and I support Israel because unlike the rest of the stinky Middle East, the Israelis aren't hateful and consumed by religion. They don't hurt atheists or gays or scientists.

Happy Hanukkah.
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:18 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
Happy Hanukkah hf
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:19 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
I just farted
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 66120287


OMG don't be mean to Jews.

I like Jews and I support Israel because unlike the rest of the stinky Middle East, the Israelis aren't hateful and consumed by religion. They don't hurt atheists or gays or scientists.

Happy Hanukkah.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 63458538


He was just sharing his expulsion of gas
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 66120287
Australia
12/16/2014 05:19 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
I just farted
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 66120287


OMG don't be mean to Jews.

I like Jews and I support Israel because unlike the rest of the stinky Middle East, the Israelis aren't hateful and consumed by religion. They don't hurt atheists or gays or scientists.

Happy Hanukkah.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 63458538



yourere
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 05:21 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
:thanksgivukkah:
Swerve  (OP)

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12/16/2014 05:29 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!


Put on your yarmulke
Here comes Chanukah
So much funukah
To celebrate Chanukah
Chanukah is the festival of lights
Instead of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights

When you feel like the only kid in town without a Christmas tree
Here's a list of people who are Jewish just like you and me
David Lee Roth lights the menorah
So do James Caan, Kirk Douglas, and the late Dinah Shore-ah

Guess who eats together at the Carnegie Deli
Bowser from Sha Na Na and Arthur Fonzerelli
Paul Newman's half Jewish, Goldie Hawn's half too
Put them together, what a fine lookin' Jew

You don't need "Deck The Halls" or "Jingle Bell Rock"
'Cause you can spin a dreidel with Captain Kirk and Mr.Spock- both
Jewish

Put on your yarmulke
It's time for Chanukah
The owner of the Seattle Supersonicahs
Celebrates Chanukah

O.J. Simpson, not a Jew
But guess who is? Hall of famer Rod Carew- he converted
We got Ann Landers and her sister Dear Abby
Harrison Ford's a quarter Jewish- not too shabby

Some people think that Ebenezer
Scrooge is
Well he's not, but guess who is
All three Stooges
So many Jews are in showbiz
Tom Cruise isn't, but I heard his agent is

Tell your friend Veronica
It's time to celebrate Chanukah
I hope I get a harmonicah
Oh this lovely, lovely Chanukah
So drink your gin and tonicah
And smoke your marijuanikah
If you really, really wannakah
Have a happy, happy, happy,
Happy Chanukah

Happy Chanukah
More Adam Sandler lyrics
Anonymous Coward
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12/16/2014 07:59 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
i cannot even begin to fathom what the Greek's side of the story is
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12/27/2016 08:59 PM
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Re: Happy Hanukkah / Chanukah !!!
[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]

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