Stellar Metamorphosis: The Truth about the Goldilocks Zone

you also need a huge planet in the solar system, like jupiter, that attracts most metors, without jupiter we probably wouldn't be here

Yep, and an atmosphere to burn up the meteors. Sure you can have a large rock orbiting in the goldilocks zone, but without an atmosphere to destroy incoming rocks surface life would have a hard time.

you also need a moon to provide alternating wet and dry land.

in other words..

everything has to be exactly like earth in order for life.

Almost. The gravitation can be weaker or stronger. But it does need water, a magnetic field and not too hot/too cold. When it comes to elements, that's up in the air.

I'm thinking oxygen breathing organisms dominate because O2 is such a great oxidizer, fluorine would be crazy...