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The VOID

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68908007
Australia
11/21/2019 02:02 PM
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Re: The VOID
Relapse is more of a process than the singular event of resuming use. It’s broken down into three stages:
Emotional
Mental
Physical
Emotional relapse is often the first stage of relapse, and it occurs before someone in recovery even begins to consider using again. The individual usually starts to experience negative emotional responses, such as anger, moodiness and anxious feelings. They also may begin to experience erratic eating and sleeping habits, and their desire for recovery often wanes due to a lack of using their support systems. These are the initial warning signs that a person in recovery could be entering the process of relapse, and it is important to recognize them as quickly as possible. This stage occurs before a person is even aware that they could be in danger of relapse, and intervening now before they enter mental relapse can prevent the issue from taking hold...

...Prompt action is the best way to address a relapse. The individual must recognize that a relapse, while not a failure, is a serious thing. Each relapse presents the potential to fall back into continuous abuse, which can lead to serious health problems and even death.


[link to americanaddictioncenters.org (secure)]

They took you on as a patient, knowing full well what was occurring. If they'd kick you to the curb rather then offering support...

You're experiencing a relapse - may be different from their "normal" patients, but much is similar.

May not know a lot of your situation, but if you ever want to chat about toxic mothers...chuckle
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:08 PM

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Re: The VOID
At this point I am going to assume you anticipated me making this move, thus dropping the information deliberately, asking for help.

If you are losing control of yourself again, you need to accept it, and start back on the path to self reliance.

Telling your therapist would be a good first step..but if you need me to make that for you, I can do that.

I will not enable you. I will walk away.
 Quoting: Seer777


Relapse is more of a process than the singular event of resuming use. It’s broken down into three stages:
Emotional
Mental
Physical
Emotional relapse is often the first stage of relapse, and it occurs before someone in recovery even begins to consider using again. The individual usually starts to experience negative emotional responses, such as anger, moodiness and anxious feelings. They also may begin to experience erratic eating and sleeping habits, and their desire for recovery often wanes due to a lack of using their support systems. These are the initial warning signs that a person in recovery could be entering the process of relapse, and it is important to recognize them as quickly as possible. This stage occurs before a person is even aware that they could be in danger of relapse, and intervening now before they enter mental relapse can prevent the issue from taking hold...

...Prompt action is the best way to address a relapse. The individual must recognize that a relapse, while not a failure, is a serious thing. Each relapse presents the potential to fall back into continuous abuse, which can lead to serious health problems and even death.


[link to americanaddictioncenters.org (secure)]

They took you on as a patient, knowing full well what was occurring. If they'd kick you to the curb rather then offering support...

You're experiencing a relapse - may be different from their "normal" patients, but much is similar.

May not know a lot of your situation, but if you ever want to chat about toxic mothers...chuckle
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 68908007


It was this exactly. You got it.

I was a deadline for this reason.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:13 PM

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Re: The VOID

[link to youtu.be (secure)]
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Xlegic

User ID: 3023613
Canada
11/21/2019 02:14 PM

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Re: The VOID
Early winter been getting to me a bit for some unknown reason. I self-sabotage my website, but I restored it back. It is about GCT mostly.

I posted gct on aether thread but I've something more to say:

The GCT is about the principle of causality aka the pattern of all patterns, I only describe and partially explain it within the 'now' moment, not linear. Still, I have yet to figure out the ultimate why.

Model Diagram of General Causality Theory
gct

a, b = anyone, anything, scalar

cause = various degrees of origin of responsible for action

effect = various degrees of any result

potential direction = conceptual depiction only, leads to 3 possibilities

life (possibilities 1 of 3) = various degrees of anyone, anything, scalars that join, participate, new, beginning, growth. vector

terminal (possibilities 2 of 3) = various degrees of stop. critical one, because it stops or "prevent" aspects of life from either becoming too much or less. it turns a vector into scalar.

death = self-explanatory.. closed loop or closed system without any sustainability. permanent end in either conceptual sense or physical.

equilibrium (possibilities 3 of 3) = coherent balanced between opposing forces or scalars.

The causality happens in constant way and is pretty fast at microscopic level. and maybe its all communicative language relationship spectrum , various degrees of it.

anyway...
Light of my Little Left Eye

User ID: 73070934
United States
11/21/2019 02:17 PM

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Re: The VOID
JESUS CHRIST seer. I havent even been online. How do you know I havent been eating? I havent been but I didnt see any of this stuff until today. You emailed zac Jones? That could be really bad. My therapist does know. But zac Jones threatened to kick me out if I didnt eat.
I didnt want him knowing.

 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


...


Go eat a dick anon. You dont know anything about me.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


The fuck you doing in rehab then?
chuckle
And at least you're somewhat correct in your last statement
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 68908007


You dont know anything about me, so dont assume that you do. Here's the dealio. This isn't eating disorder treatment and they dont consider themselves qualified to deal with serious active eating disorders. If you think about it people would be creating a sort of liability for them by engaging in that behavior at a place that only specializes in drug treatment. My eating disorder was under control for my first 3 months here, it wasn't an issue. Recently its cropped up again and I'm sitting here on my hands trying to figure out the best way to handle it. The last thing I want is to be kicked out, because eating disorder treatment is kinda toxic and I can never live with my mom again. This is also the most stable my life has been in a long time and the reason for this self sabotage going on with me is unclear. I dont know what to do yet.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


All I said is you were beginning to show symptoms of your eating disorder returning that that you had mentioned to me your anxiety increasing to panic.

I asked if they would monitor your meal times and address your anxiety, due to one fueling the other.
 Quoting: Seer777


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:21 PM

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Re: The VOID
All I said is you were beginning to show symptoms of your eating disorder returning that that you had mentioned to me your anxiety increasing to panic.

I asked if they would monitor your meal times and address your anxiety, due to one fueling the other.
 Quoting: Seer777


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


I told them I noticed your shift in attitude about 2-3 weeks back and the you had told me directly of your anxiety and had mentioned that you had not eaten any fat or protein for a week.

I also told them that I had been supporting you through this since 2016, and that I was hoping it would get you to accept the gravity of your situation.

I spent a half hour at least, writing it. Everything I could think to help them, help you, without saying too much.

I sent it on my gmail account so they may track me here. You should be aware of that.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Xlegic

User ID: 3023613
Canada
11/21/2019 02:25 PM

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Re: The VOID
What gct could mean for yall and me:

We don't want it to end up badly. It is all about a spectrum of communicative types of relationship.
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:26 PM

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Re: The VOID
All I said is you were beginning to show symptoms of your eating disorder returning that that you had mentioned to me your anxiety increasing to panic.

I asked if they would monitor your meal times and address your anxiety, due to one fueling the other.
 Quoting: Seer777


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


I told them I noticed your shift in attitude about 2-3 weeks back and the you had told me directly of your anxiety and had mentioned that you had not eaten any fat or protein for a week.

I also told them that I had been supporting you through this since 2016, and that I was hoping it would get you to accept the gravity of your situation.

I spent a half hour at least, writing it. Everything I could think to help them, help you, without saying too much.

I sent it on my gmail account so they may track me here. You should be aware of that.
 Quoting: Seer777


You asked me how far I would go to save someone.

I went as far as outing myself. Which for me, is one of my biggest fears.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68908007
Australia
11/21/2019 02:29 PM
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Re: The VOID
Early winter been getting to me a bit for some unknown reason. I self-sabotage my website, but I restored it back. It is about GCT mostly.

I posted gct on aether thread but I've something more to say:

The GCT is about the principle of causality aka the pattern of all patterns, I only describe and partially explain it within the 'now' moment, not linear. Still, I have yet to figure out the ultimate why.

Model Diagram of General Causality Theory
:gct:

a, b = anyone, anything, scalar

cause = various degrees of origin of responsible for action

effect = various degrees of any result

potential direction = conceptual depiction only, leads to 3 possibilities

life (possibilities 1 of 3) = various degrees of anyone, anything, scalars that join, participate, new, beginning, growth. vector

terminal (possibilities 2 of 3) = various degrees of stop. critical one, because it stops or "prevent" aspects of life from either becoming too much or less. it turns a vector into scalar.

death = self-explanatory.. closed loop or closed system without any sustainability. permanent end in either conceptual sense or physical.

equilibrium (possibilities 3 of 3) = coherent balanced between opposing forces or scalars.

The causality happens in constant way and is pretty fast at microscopic level. and maybe its all communicative language relationship spectrum , various degrees of it.

anyway...
 Quoting: Xlegic


What would the diagram look like if you changed the "Death" aspect to transformation/modification.
Even keeping it purely "scientific".
Eg
My thesis was wrong. It's dead (end of line)
My thesis was wrong. It needs modification (loop reopens)
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:34 PM

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Re: The VOID
I noticed something particular on my first forum that continues to now.

Several members told me they were dreaming of me and that I was always there offering them comfort, when something scary or dire was happening in the dream.

When I came to GLP, again people told me they would dream of me. I started having weird GLP dreams as well..that continue to this day.
 Quoting: Seer777


You do have a very particular essence that leaves a strong impression.

Let me ask you...if you knew that somebody close to you was suffering greatly, and you were the only one who could help, how far would you go to save them?
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


I suppose it would depend if I felt I could live with myself, if I didn't..

However, remember rushing to aid, is one of the ways to utilize the force improperly that can lead to the dark side.

Everything needs to be measured and sometime suffering is necessary for great growth.

Watching other people suffer only hurts if you have a capacity for empathy.

I saw a great meme about that very thing yesterday. I wonder if I saved it. It made me tear up.


[link to i.imgur.com (secure)]

<3
 Quoting: Seer777


BoJack Horseman | Season 6 | Hollyhock Has an Anxiety Attack


[link to youtu.be (secure)]
 Quoting: Seer777

Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68908007
Australia
11/21/2019 02:37 PM
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Re: The VOID
~Hexy~`
User ID: 75414163
Canada
11/21/2019 02:51 PM
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Re: The VOID
Don't run from pain,.. for it prevents you from taking that next step.

Embrace your pain and deal with it,.. like everyone has to.

After all,..I am a fellow GuLPer trying to sooth your souls.stonerlolsign
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 02:51 PM

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Re: The VOID
All I said is you were beginning to show symptoms of your eating disorder returning that that you had mentioned to me your anxiety increasing to panic.

I asked if they would monitor your meal times and address your anxiety, due to one fueling the other.
 Quoting: Seer777


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


You're going to have to choose which you want to do more. Get better, or game the system and then die.

You should watch season 6 of Bojack Horseman. You have to want to get better.

And if you fall, just get back up and keep walking.

Everyone has too. Or lay down and die. You choose.

Hey Seer. How ya been?
 Quoting: Zer0Phi


Walking the line.

:)




[link to youtu.be (secure)]

walktheline
 Quoting: Seer777

Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:12 PM

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Re: The VOID
What gct could mean for yall and me:

We don't want it to end up badly. It is all about a spectrum of communicative types of relationship.
 Quoting: Xlegic



[link to youtu.be (secure)]
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68908007
Australia
11/21/2019 03:21 PM
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Re: The VOID


Feel like a laugh is needed

chuckle
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:33 PM

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:P


[link to youtu.be (secure)]
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78185067
Ireland
11/21/2019 03:34 PM
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Re: The VOID
All I said is you were beginning to show symptoms of your eating disorder returning that that you had mentioned to me your anxiety increasing to panic.

I asked if they would monitor your meal times and address your anxiety, due to one fueling the other.
 Quoting: Seer777


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


I told them I noticed your shift in attitude about 2-3 weeks back and the you had told me directly of your anxiety and had mentioned that you had not eaten any fat or protein for a week.

I also told them that I had been supporting you through this since 2016, and that I was hoping it would get you to accept the gravity of your situation.

I spent a half hour at least, writing it. Everything I could think to help them, help you, without saying too much.

I sent it on my gmail account so they may track me here. You should be aware of that.
 Quoting: Seer777


You asked me how far I would go to save someone.

I went as far as outing myself. Which for me, is one of my biggest fears.
 Quoting: Seer777


That was pretty intrusive and could have bad consequences.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77631946
United States
11/21/2019 03:37 PM
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Re: The VOID
Early winter been getting to me a bit for some unknown reason. I self-sabotage my website, but I restored it back. It is about GCT mostly.

I posted gct on aether thread but I've something more to say:

The GCT is about the principle of causality aka the pattern of all patterns, I only describe and partially explain it within the 'now' moment, not linear. Still, I have yet to figure out the ultimate why.

Model Diagram of General Causality Theory
:gct:

a, b = anyone, anything, scalar

cause = various degrees of origin of responsible for action

effect = various degrees of any result

potential direction = conceptual depiction only, leads to 3 possibilities

life (possibilities 1 of 3) = various degrees of anyone, anything, scalars that join, participate, new, beginning, growth. vector

terminal (possibilities 2 of 3) = various degrees of stop. critical one, because it stops or "prevent" aspects of life from either becoming too much or less. it turns a vector into scalar.

death = self-explanatory.. closed loop or closed system without any sustainability. permanent end in either conceptual sense or physical.

equilibrium (possibilities 3 of 3) = coherent balanced between opposing forces or scalars.

The causality happens in constant way and is pretty fast at microscopic level. and maybe its all communicative language relationship spectrum , various degrees of it.

anyway...
 Quoting: Xlegic


definitely a five candle menorah! lol
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:37 PM

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Re: The VOID
...


I do appreciate that you care seer, it means a lot to me. I just hope this doesn't work out badly.
 Quoting: Light of my Little Left Eye


I told them I noticed your shift in attitude about 2-3 weeks back and the you had told me directly of your anxiety and had mentioned that you had not eaten any fat or protein for a week.

I also told them that I had been supporting you through this since 2016, and that I was hoping it would get you to accept the gravity of your situation.

I spent a half hour at least, writing it. Everything I could think to help them, help you, without saying too much.

I sent it on my gmail account so they may track me here. You should be aware of that.
 Quoting: Seer777


You asked me how far I would go to save someone.

I went as far as outing myself. Which for me, is one of my biggest fears.
 Quoting: Seer777


That was pretty intrusive and could have bad consequences.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


So could not have doing anything.

I know her better than you do and have been supporting her through this for years now.

Like I said, she left me no option and I don't feel bad or conflicted about it whatsoever.

I will accept any consequence that comes knowing full well.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:41 PM

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Re: The VOID
I knew the moment she told me where she was back in the beginning of October, it was going to come into play.

I brushed off cult fears, to increasing synchronicity, while waited to see how this would play out.


About exactly how I thought it would. When she mentioned not eating..that was my go signal.

K is not dumb.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78185067
Ireland
11/21/2019 03:42 PM
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Re: The VOID
...


I told them I noticed your shift in attitude about 2-3 weeks back and the you had told me directly of your anxiety and had mentioned that you had not eaten any fat or protein for a week.

I also told them that I had been supporting you through this since 2016, and that I was hoping it would get you to accept the gravity of your situation.

I spent a half hour at least, writing it. Everything I could think to help them, help you, without saying too much.

I sent it on my gmail account so they may track me here. You should be aware of that.
 Quoting: Seer777


You asked me how far I would go to save someone.

I went as far as outing myself. Which for me, is one of my biggest fears.
 Quoting: Seer777


That was pretty intrusive and could have bad consequences.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


So could not have doing anything.

I know her better than you do and have been supporting her through this for years now.

Like I said, she left me no option and I don't feel bad or conflicted about it whatsoever.

I will accept any consequence that comes knowing full well.
 Quoting: Seer777


It doesn't matter, it's her own personal business and you had no right breaking trust like that. Her life is hardly at risk in a rehab.
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:47 PM

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Re: The VOID
That was pretty intrusive and could have bad consequences.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


So could not have doing anything.

I know her better than you do and have been supporting her through this for years now.

Like I said, she left me no option and I don't feel bad or conflicted about it whatsoever.

I will accept any consequence that comes knowing full well.
 Quoting: Seer777


It doesn't matter, it's her own personal business and you had no right breaking trust like that. Her life is hardly at risk in a rehab.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


She made it my business. It matters to me and you sound like you're just trying to start something.

I've heard your opinion..


Can't change what is already done and I gave her 2 days to respond. Is what it is.

You can go ahead and feel bad for me or her if you want. Doesn't matter to me how you feel.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78185067
Ireland
11/21/2019 03:48 PM
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Re: The VOID
That was pretty intrusive and could have bad consequences.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


So could not have doing anything.

I know her better than you do and have been supporting her through this for years now.

Like I said, she left me no option and I don't feel bad or conflicted about it whatsoever.

I will accept any consequence that comes knowing full well.
 Quoting: Seer777


It doesn't matter, it's her own personal business and you had no right breaking trust like that. Her life is hardly at risk in a rehab.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


She made it my business. It matters to me and you sound like you're just trying to start something.

I've heard your opinion..


Can't change what is already done and I gave her 2 days to respond. Is what it is.

You can go ahead and feel bad for me or her if you want. Doesn't matter to me how you feel.
 Quoting: Seer777


Yeah its all about you isnt it?putin
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 03:50 PM

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Re: The VOID
It sure isn't about you.

You can leave or I can help you leave if you like.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77631946
United States
11/21/2019 03:51 PM
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Re: The VOID
higet -- higer -- 7

figit -- plant

7 us

plant us


lol
lol
User ID: 77631946
United States
11/21/2019 03:52 PM
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higet -- higer -- 7

figit -- plant

7 us

plant us


lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77631946


latin to english -- lol
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78185067
Ireland
11/21/2019 03:54 PM
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Re: The VOID
It sure isn't about you.

You can leave or I can help you leave if you like.
 Quoting: Seer777


No its not. Do what you want.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77631946
United States
11/21/2019 03:56 PM
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Re: The VOID
It sure isn't about you.

You can leave or I can help you leave if you like.
 Quoting: Seer777


No its not. Do what you want.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78185067


cutbait? lol
Seer777  (OP)
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United States
11/21/2019 03:57 PM

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Re: The VOID
I'm making rings. One of the myriad of things I do to make a living.

When this tray I have been laying all morning is done, I will have 24 flower rings.

Holiday season is upon is.

Cheers.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca
Seer777  (OP)
Ride the wings of the mind

User ID: 78182431
United States
11/21/2019 04:07 PM

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Re: The VOID
For all anyone knows, the staff may have caught on in another week and kicked her out, due to it.

Another week or two and she would have been well on her way to a steep decline. She doesn't have much fat to begin with.

Best to nip it in the bud.

I feel like my email made impression. As I tend to.
Difficulties strengthen the Mind as labor does the body...
~Seneca





GLP