Woman Fatally Stabbed By Wind-Blown Beach Umbrella In Freak Accident

Yep. Crazy.

Time to disarm all umbrella carrying English Gentlemen!!!

Horrible thing to happen. And everyone with her traumatized forever.

Umbrellas don't kill people......

I had the same thing happen I got a mark on my leftbun where some wind got an ambrella and it stabbed me in the left ass cheek

Very true...makes you think about all the other things that must have had to line up to make it happen in your life.

Meeting people, jobs, where you live, who your neighbours are etc...

My ex and I actually remember seeing each other and having eye contact two years before we met.
We had both had arguments with our then partners and I was sitting on the steps outside to cool off and he was driving around to cool off...our eyes met as he drove up the hill

Was it a black umbrella?

Right in the solar plexus

Why do these freak accidents always happen to middle aged women?

The exact statistical chance of just about anything happening.

Now, calling it BEFORE it happens - that would be impressive.

In the near future, Federal Regulations will require Nerf-tipped umbrellas which must be epoxied into the beach sand or you will be levied with a stiff fine. Also, a complete ban on wind gusts in coastal areas must be considered. Mandatory umbrella insurance must be purchased before visiting any beaches in the continental US. It's for your own safety and security...so don't argue with US.

Have a nice, safe vacation.--Dept. Of Homeland Security

[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]

Final Designation!

Yep....just like in those Omen movies....the ones from the 70's.

All types of freaky shit would happen that you couldn't explain.

Are those movies any good? I never saw one

I guess there are 1001 ways to die...not how I want to go. I would prefer Yellowstone blowing it's top.

That is fucked! This kind of shit would never have happened in the berenstein side of reality.

Years back I read a story where a kid 19 was killed on his birthday, by a semi flipping over on his car at a freeway exit ramp.

The first one... but bear in mind its a 70's movie.

That is not only the future but almost already reality. Before we are done with this, insurance will be required for how many steps you take in a day and how dangerous those steps are (all tracked of course).

All this means is that things happen. Weird, shitty, odd-defying things happen. With regularity. That doesn't necessarily mean that these events are supposed to happen.

At least that is understandable...a truck is heavy and is operated by a fallible human. The god-directed umbrella jart is a completely different matter.

Damn, I have tears running down my face from laughing so hard at some of these comments!
This is a fucking classic glp thread full of humor!

OK you are a fag, why make fun of or entertainment of a woman's death... Stick to Facebook D-bag...

Last Edited by Deplorable American on 06/09/2016 11:50 PM

Fucking tombstones.

Probably because after years of avoiding their one major threat, the automatic side door on the minivan, they just aren't as focused.

They can have my umbrella when they pry it from my dead, sandy, sunburned hands.....

Yeah. So true about all tthe things having to line up "just right."

What a freak thing. But when she stopped and considered all the ways that she might die someday she didn't think of this one. So sad--she looked like a nice person. Crazy.