I’m waiting for this conversation to transpire one of these nights on coast...

GEORGE: Don from Topeka, welcome. What’s your story for us?

CALLER: Hi George. Well, it was 1992.. I worked graveyard..

GEORGE: What, like digging the pits?

CALLER: What?

GEORGE: You said you worked graveyard..

CALLER: Yes.

GEORGE: So were you one of the guys who dug holes in the ground to put the coffins in?

(Silence)

CALLER: Can you hear me okay?

GEORGE: Yep, you’re coming in loud and clear. So what did you do at the graveyard? Maintenance? Did you ride the mower? Use the edger around the tombstones?

CALLER: George, I worked midnight to 8AM...

GEORGE (interrupting): Oh boy, I bet it gets creepy out there at night. Did you use a flashlight?

CALLER: I’m going to start over and explain it so a bonobo can understand... I used to work midnight to 8AM cleaning offices.

GEORGE: (long pause) When did you find time to work your other job at the graveyard?

(Silence)

(CLICK!)... :dial tone:

GEORGE: It looks like we lost Don. Tommy, call him back, would you? I can’t wait to hear about what happened to him at the graveyard.