My mom is disappointed w me as a son

True but I was smart as shit for a fifteen years old so now it's balancing out.

become a social media influencer. them guys get paid thousands of dollars just to post picctures of themselfs wearing bikinis at fyre festival and so on

People without Aspergers mature and get smarter throughout life, so at age 60 we have lots of wisdom and life experiences. That you will miss and still be the mind of a 15 year old eternally, unable to function in adult situations.

Not something mom should be ashamed of. She just needs to understand your status.

Last Edited by Agent 99 on 05/06/2019 02:19 AM

I don't get how u and I know this but it's not common knowledge.

And if so, what's even my expectations from society? Just try not to fuck up?

And talk less about doing things, just plan them and do them.

Expectations from society is basic Maslow Hierarchy development, which is more difficult for aspergers.

So you won't be able to support a family and raise children, the non-aspergers will do all the work. You will not participate in adult duties maturely and therefore not contribute to other adults in conversation or knowledge. You will not achieve higher spirituality.

I mean, you can try but it's going to be a struggle and you will be more angry, tired and hungry than real adults, and that makes you a burden on others who have to take up that slack.

Aspergers don't have those skills. But they can learn, it just takes them more time and effort.

Same OP. Just remember.........

I know this is probably going to go over your head. It took me many many years to understand it also.

There is a shortcut that works for most moms.

Buy her a necklace!

yes if she likes that stuff, otherwise something similar, something shiny and gold and expensive.

now not some cheap shit, pearls the most expensive but suiting her, you only think of her.

Something she can show to all of her friends, she will show it off, say to all her social group and family: wow what a beautiful necklace? oh my son gave me that (full of pride)
then it doesn't really matter what you do, she will support you. she doesn't need to know the details, and doesn't want to know, just that your able to stand on your feet.

if you can't afford that now, then that shows that you need an aim, your aim is to make enough money to afford to pay her back for all the hardwork and suffering she went through so you could be here...

Share this with Mum.

Last Edited by PINKORCHID- In the Light on 05/06/2019 03:15 AM

Gifting isn't the only love language.

good video.

I could always tell from a young age that I must be looking at the same world as everyone else sees but i see it thru somewhat different goggles.

That's good the Asperger's don't focus on societal issues, we would get stuck, because they are unresolvable in a single lifetime. Instead like the narrator said, we focus on problem solving.... Just to make the negative feelings subdue to normal levels.



Then the fact that we react differently than others would expect, that's like being the wild card.

My ex gf cheated and I didn't get mad or exact revenge. I started blankly, and walked away in a calm fashion, like an alien.

It's usually social things making problems.

Hey you homeboy you online boy?

Aspergers? And how is that your fault. More like it's something your mother Took, or something she had given to you. Now she's blaming you. What a flaming bitch. Maybe if she had taken more responsibility to know what was in all those shots, you might be Mr Normal with a 4.0 gpa.
You need to decide what interests you and how that might be your future. You might also work on detoxing heavy metals from your body. In the meantime, I'd call her out on her incompetence in raising/protecting you. It's NOT your fault.

Ask her if she is willing to pay your tuition costs and expenses.

If she say's no, send her links of student debt problems.

Stereotype is the mind killer.

45 year old 180 IQ, INFJ, Aspergers, so far out on the introversion scale I make vow of silence taking hermits look like extroverts.

But I graduated college (yes, I almost didn't, only went to class for tests and most of my professors hated that) started my own IT company after getting screwed over in three jobs, and decided I could do it better working for myself. Sold that company and retired at 30.

The key is finding someone who you can relate to, and can act as your handler. I was lucky in that I met my wife on a summer job when I was very young. She and I spoke the same internal language, almost non-verbal and we were finishing each other's lines of code before our first day of working together was done. She is on the spectrum too, but an INTJ, smarter and higher functioning than I am. She still works, IT project manager and I'm at home raising a family of 4 children, happy to have found a place and a purpose. She is my handler and helps me function when the world is too much, and I'm her shrink, I have a gift of seeing people as the are and not as they project.

My parents pretended to be supportive, especially during high school when I couldn't really hide my intellectual gifts anymore, but in truth it was painfully obvious I was not a child they could relate to.

Even today, happily married with kids, they don't understand me or the choices I've made.

But that doesn't matter if you find someone who understands you and speaks your internal language. So leave the stereotypes behinds, hit the road, take a quest, and find that someone.

Yes I am life coach. You need to find one. Go and have an assessment identifying where your interests are. Once those things are determined then decide which area seems most appealing to you.

You need a life coach to get you through the registration and school process. Those with Asperger's need help here and also need to know that higher education is more easily acquired than high school as you are learning things mostly that peak your interest.

I was just successful getting a young man back in school who quit a t 14 with the same illness. He has now just completed college and university.

Many do well in computers and coding as they are usually very bright just less social.

Why is she disappointed? Because you aren't in college or are going at your own pace? Who cares? If you are happy and supporting yourself and are able to do the things that bring joy in your life, then you are leading a fulfilling life.

Always a possibility. Women love loud, exciting men. Even if they are strange or different.

I like the trade school/votech too.

i was born with a vestigial tail. the dr removed it shortly after birth. im a genetic throwback and i WILL go supersayin like GOKU

Son...
*looks left*
*looks right*
... I am disappoint

ok so find a life coach that sounded smart

computer jobs and lots of school is off the table.

i appreciate those posters who wrote out thoughful advice
i read this thread over and over to exract all the info just some of the inflamatory comments i had to step away and totally refocus the next day

lot of good info here thank you. the hard part here is knowing how who is most correct.

You know something? That's how most people feel some/all the time.

Not at all to dismiss what you feel. But our culture has very narrow boxes for how humans are supposed to be. The reality is that we;re all quirky in our own ways.

I come from a family that had Aspergers members going back generations right to the present day.

Before all the destructive labelling started they they were just accepted as eccentric or driven etc. Many of them have done amazing, creative things, made lots of money, and some have changed the world for the better (like real things that you would at least be benefiting from today). No doubt they were all out of phase with most of the rest of the population.

Did they care? Nope! Not a damn! They just went their own way and did what they did.

I'm not Aspergers, but I've definitely benefited from being in a family that accepted and even congratulated out-out-phase differences.

Personally, I loathe all the disabling labels and 'disorder' treatment. I definitely think that the world NEEDS Asperger people. (well, except for an aunt who is a total pain in the neck...! She's a one-woman chaos-creating machine with all her me-me-me shit and total lack of boundaries whenever she wants anything.)