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I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig

 
Dace
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06/01/2019 08:34 PM
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I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
My father died last week...I found his body..
Thread: My Dad Died.......

It's weird....I've felt like I should feel bad because I haven't shed a tear for him.....but I can't make myself feel bad for not doing so....

He was hooked on prescription meds when I was growing up, fanatically Pentecostal religious and like a Jeckyl and Hyde that could snap at anything.

I was chased out of the house with a baseball bat in middle school because he found a soggy Playboy mag I found in the woods....

In highschool, we lived in a duplex....I stayed and rented out the 2nd half after graduation because I didn't want to leave my mom and my little brother alone with him.....After I was 21 he chased me out with a .44 mag because he saw me come in with a bottle of whisky...

He also used to wake my mother up in the morning by dry-clicking a 12 gauge shotgun to her head and telling her she deserved to die for polluting her holy temple (body) that god had given her.

Thank god my mother finally divorced him,,,,,but he got custody of my little brother.

When my lil' bro turned 18, he left with the clothes on his back and turned up halfway across the country just to get away from the fucker.

.
....
......

But yeah......I never patched things up but I eventually started keeping in contact, especially after Dad got sick and needed help...I may hate the things he did and how he screwed up everyone's lives but he's my dad.....I wouldn't be here without him.

But so far....not one damn tear for him....I've tried...
I've tried to summon up good memories, etc....but nothing.

Then..

Today......my kids' guinea pig died, and they've been devastated.

Having to see them deal with the grief of their beloved pet and friend.....drawing pictures of themselves with their little buddy.....left me in tears.

Been trying to take their minds off of it....so I just went through my 5 yr old daughter's 'beauty shop'....I now have blue, yellow, green and pink finger/toenails and my face resembles something between a Klingon and an ugly-ass geisha. damned

I know....not the place for this...just had to vent and I can't post this shit on FB.hf
eekers
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06/01/2019 08:36 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
I get it, grief is a process,
No wrong way to go through it, just do what feels right for you
"We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time." - T. S. Eliot
Dace  (OP)

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06/01/2019 08:37 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
I get it, grief is a process,
No wrong way to go through it, just do what feels right for you
 Quoting: eekers


Trying to...hf

Just read the title again...this sounds like a Richard Gere thread..damned
Mrvainls
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06/01/2019 08:37 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
hf
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 08:38 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
God bless you
Copperhead

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06/01/2019 08:39 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Pics or it didn't happen.
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 08:40 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
:). You’re A-OK. You’re a good father to your kids. So I guess you could say you did learn something positive from your dad despite his bad behavior a lot of times. You’re making sure your kids have a good childhood. :)

LOLing at your description of what your kids did to you with those colors.
eekers
Dreamer of Dreams

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06/01/2019 08:41 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
I get it, grief is a process,
No wrong way to go through it, just do what feels right for you
 Quoting: eekers


Trying to...hf

Just read the title again...this sounds like a Richard Gere thread..damned
 Quoting: Dace


Lmao

Definitely has that kink factor, yes
"We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time." - T. S. Eliot
Anonymous Coward
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Netherlands
06/01/2019 08:42 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Just be sure to wring out that guinea pig real well when you're done with it, goddam things get moldy if you put them away wet. peace
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 08:42 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
You sound like a really good dad
Sorry about your dad hf
asleeptotheworld

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06/01/2019 08:43 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Dont feel guilty for what you're feeling. Parents deaths are complicated, especially when the relationship wasnt healthy.

There's no right way to feel, as long as you're taking care of yourself.
~Jazz~Moderator
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06/01/2019 08:44 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
I now have blue, yellow, green and pink finger/toenails and my face resembles something between a Klingon and an ugly-ass geisha. damned

 Quoting: Dace


jgkitlaugh

Just hug and love those kids Dace. Best little packages of healing G-d ever created.
To know where your heart is, look where your mind goes when it wanders.

A rock in bad hands killed Abel. A rock in good hands killed Goliath. It isn't about the rock.

A true warrior fights not because he hates the one in front of him, but because he loves those behind him.

INTP-A
Malu nli

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06/01/2019 08:47 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Some dads are here to teach us how we don’t want to be when we grow up.
White Wolf Waking

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06/01/2019 08:49 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
I'm so sorry. hf
ANIMAL FRIEND

"All creatures are created from the same paternal heartbeat of God. Not to hurt our humble brethren is our first duty to them, but to stop there is not enough. We have a higher mission--to be of service to them wherever they require it. If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow men."

-St. Francis of Assisi

"The greatness of a nation and it's moral progress can be judged by the way in which its animals are treated."
-Gandhi

Thread: Top 10 Opera Auditions (My Music Thread)
esoteric Morgan
...in awe of many things

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06/01/2019 09:10 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Some dads are here to teach us how we don’t want to be when we grow up.
 Quoting: Malu nli


This!

Love to you, Dace!

hugs
-- TRUST THE PLAN --
.......WWG1WGA......
____________________________
still in awe of many things
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 09:18 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
You did what you needed to do.
His time here, was finished, and clearly his personal demons had won.

The twisted selfishness leaves with him and you are now free.

Displaying empathy for the loss of your child’s pet, means you are not broken.

Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 09:19 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Some dads are here to teach us how we don’t want to be when we grow up.
 Quoting: Malu nli


This!

Love to you, Dace!

hugs
 Quoting: esoteric Morgan


Some mums do this too.
TlvmmCpoft

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Poland
06/01/2019 09:20 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Some of the easiest deaths to deal with were people I was mad at.

It's funny because two people I generally liked both managed to irritate the heck out of me shortly before they died (no, I didn't kill them).

In a way, that anger they give you is a gift. One that makes their death easier to manage.
I don't know what lies they told you, but I can promise they were lies.

There's a fine line between training, trauma, and torture.
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 09:21 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
TITLE TURNED ME ON
Polkahonkus

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06/01/2019 09:21 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
My Pu have to wonder what made him like that.

Both my parents are depression era children. As theybage theybreveal the childhood anxiety they’ve hidden all these decades.

They get hysterical about money.

Those little white clapboard churches had kids my generation in the Monday morning school bus with eyes like saucers a s serious anxiety about the devil.

My dad was crazy too. He couldn’t help it and sometimes he was really fun.

We are all crazy.

Just remember to take your makeup off before you go to bed..

Folks is thinking of you.
~kpm~

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06/01/2019 09:23 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
You’re a great Dad, probably doing for your kids what you wanted

Love to you and the kids!

Would like to see a pic of you in makeup.....cool2
~With forethought and malice Whitless enacted an EO giving nursing homes immunity from wrongful death prosecutions, forced them to take in infected patients and is responsible for over 6500+ nursing home deaths~
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 09:24 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Aww...so sorry for what you went through.
You sound like such a good dad.
Glad there are still guys like you out there.
This post really touched me in a soft spot in my heart.
I don't know you at all but you already have my affection.
hf
Anonymous Coward
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06/01/2019 09:25 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Life -- the strangest journey.
DARTH SILIOUS
Abrasive Fuck

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06/01/2019 09:35 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Don't feel bad Dace. I didn't weep for any of my ancestors either. Even the one I liked.

The only thing I took away from it was now it's my turn, and I damned well do a better job than they did.
Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The Force shall free me.

Or something
john b
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06/01/2019 09:36 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
So I am assuming that you wearing makeup as 17yr old, smeared red lipstick while sporting beard stubble and an ill fitting red dress with hairy legs would have caused dad to actually load that shot gun and send some rounds your way ?
HAWK-03
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06/01/2019 09:43 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
fandango beer
Pickle Suprise!
bigD111

User ID: 65945302
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06/01/2019 09:52 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Well, it sounds effed up Dace, how you were raised. Make it right by being the kind of father your kids will be sad to lose. That's payback! God bless you brother!
deplorably republican
Dace  (OP)

User ID: 76206631
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06/01/2019 09:52 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
My father died last week...I found his body..
Thread: My Dad Died.......

It's weird....I've felt like I should feel bad because I haven't shed a tear for him.....but I can't make myself feel bad for not doing so....

He was hooked on prescription meds when I was growing up, fanatically Pentecostal religious and like a Jeckyl and Hyde that could snap at anything.

I was chased out of the house with a baseball bat in middle school because he found a soggy Playboy mag I found in the woods....

In highschool, we lived in a duplex....I stayed and rented out the 2nd half after graduation because I didn't want to leave my mom and my little brother alone with him.....After I was 21 he chased me out with a .44 mag because he saw me come in with a bottle of whisky...

He also used to wake my mother up in the morning by dry-clicking a 12 gauge shotgun to her head and telling her she deserved to die for polluting her holy temple (body) that god had given her.

Thank god my mother finally divorced him,,,,,but he got custody of my little brother.

When my lil' bro turned 18, he left with the clothes on his back and turned up halfway across the country just to get away from the fucker.

.
....
......

But yeah......I never patched things up but I eventually started keeping in contact, especially after Dad got sick and needed help...I may hate the things he did and how he screwed up everyone's lives but he's my dad.....I wouldn't be here without him.

But so far....not one damn tear for him....I've tried...
I've tried to summon up good memories, etc....but nothing.

Then..

Today......my kids' guinea pig died, and they've been devastated.

Having to see them deal with the grief of their beloved pet and friend.....drawing pictures of themselves with their little buddy.....left me in tears.

Been trying to take their minds off of it....so I just went through my 5 yr old daughter's 'beauty shop'....I now have blue, yellow, green and pink finger/toenails and my face resembles something between a Klingon and an ugly-ass geisha. damned

I know....not the place for this...just had to vent and I can't post this shit on FB.hf
 Quoting: Dace


Dude...wow.
 Quoting: Chip


I know...lol

Whenever I get his ashes and go plant him in the family plot......it's a toss-up between just pissing on the spot or planting some flowers first and telling myself I'm fertilizing them.

Can't force a tear for my dad but I lose it over a damn guinea pig. I'm pissed at myself for not being mad at myself....It's a completely new fucked-up feeling that I am not enjoying.
Dace  (OP)

User ID: 76206631
United States
06/01/2019 09:54 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Well, it sounds effed up Dace, how you were raised. Make it right by being the kind of father your kids will be sad to lose. That's payback! God bless you brother!
 Quoting: bigD111


TY..I actually mentally try to be the complete opposite of my dad in every way, shape and form.
bigD111

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06/01/2019 09:57 PM

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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Well, it sounds effed up Dace, how you were raised. Make it right by being the kind of father your kids will be sad to lose. That's payback! God bless you brother!
 Quoting: bigD111


TY..I actually mentally try to be the complete opposite of my dad in every way, shape and form.
 Quoting: Dace


I had a step father that was hell himself, and I do the same. Cruel evil bastard! Worked me to death when I was a kid!
deplorably republican
Dace  (OP)

User ID: 76206631
United States
06/01/2019 09:58 PM
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Re: I'm Tipsy, Wearing Makeup and Crying Over a Guinea Pig
Well, it sounds effed up Dace, how you were raised. Make it right by being the kind of father your kids will be sad to lose. That's payback! God bless you brother!
 Quoting: bigD111


TY..I actually mentally try to be the complete opposite of my dad in every way, shape and form.
 Quoting: Dace


I had a step father that was hell himself, and I do the same. Cruel evil bastard! Worked me to death when I was a kid!
 Quoting: bigD111


hugs





GLP