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LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P

 
CitizenPerth
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11/18/2019 01:40 AM
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LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
[snip]

WORLD—Airports around the world are reporting record revenues after introducing a long-awaited feature: the ability to turn off CNN on television sets in their terminals.

For just one quarter, you can turn off CNN for a full fifteen minutes while you're waiting for your flight, leaving you with the "far superior" experience of just staring at a blank screen.

"At long last," said one man waiting for his flight at LaGuardia as he dropped a few dollars' worth of quarters into the "Turn CNN Off" slot. "Honestly, I might fly more now." He's not alone: airports expect a 426% uptick in traveling over the holidays as flyers no longer have to worry about having the droning words of CNN hosts pounded into their heads for hours on a layover.

The feature has been one of the most-requested by travelers along with the dismantling of the TSA and pretzel bags with more than 3 pretzels in them...

... A similar program is being rolled out in hospital waiting rooms throughout the country...

[end snip]

FULL ARTICLE: [babylon bee]/news/airport-revenues-soar-after-allowing-travelers-to-p​ay-to-turn-off-cnn?fbclid=IwAR19XB4kFA_h33QhHCt33OuWBVB7K5uMi​DAEa9bbh0_Q5tOoBjhT1dRQJdY

Last Edited by CitizenPerth™ on 11/18/2019 01:47 AM
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CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 01:40 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
laugh
It's life as we know it, but only just.
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sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2019 01:49 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Hahahahahahahaha! dancingmoving
~BigBlock~

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11/18/2019 01:54 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
clownbomb
Man is forever solving the most perplexing problems as he ventures ever further into the unknown. But where are the outer limits of his ingenuity? Will he ever encounter a problem, a Gordian Knot, which he cannot ultimately cut?

--GLPPower--
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 02:01 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
oh, that whole "feel good, warm fuzzy article of the week".... we can all sleep better now...


TSA and 3 bag pretzels... GRIN...

chuckle

Last Edited by CitizenPerth™ on 11/18/2019 02:02 AM
It's life as we know it, but only just.
[link to citizenperth.wordpress.com]
sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 02:03 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
next thing you know, they'll let our pets on board, and start serving real steak and tatters, with silverware again .. ;)
It's life as we know it, but only just.
[link to citizenperth.wordpress.com]
sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 02:06 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
fuggit.. i'll pin this when there's room, for the smiles in our heads only....

and epstein didn't kill himself....

murdered? alive? i don't give a shit.....

back to topic ... BURN CNN in public places....

iwish

Last Edited by CitizenPerth™ on 11/18/2019 02:11 AM
It's life as we know it, but only just.
[link to citizenperth.wordpress.com]
sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
~BigBlock~

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11/18/2019 02:11 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
fuggit.. i'll pin this when there's room, for the smiles in our heads only....

and epstein didn't kill himself....

murdered? alive? i don't give a shit.....

back to topic ... BURN CNN in public places....

iwish
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


I already tried also LOL
Man is forever solving the most perplexing problems as he ventures ever further into the unknown. But where are the outer limits of his ingenuity? Will he ever encounter a problem, a Gordian Knot, which he cannot ultimately cut?

--GLPPower--
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 02:13 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
fuggit.. i'll pin this when there's room, for the smiles in our heads only....

and epstein didn't kill himself....

murdered? alive? i don't give a shit.....

back to topic ... BURN CNN in public places....

iwish
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


I already tried also LOL
 Quoting: ~BigBlock~


lol! bastages!
It's life as we know it, but only just.
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sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 02:15 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
it leads me to another off hand topic? wtf is a cockle?
It's life as we know it, but only just.
[link to citizenperth.wordpress.com]
sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
~BigBlock~

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11/18/2019 02:25 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
it leads me to another off hand topic? wtf is a cockle?
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


1dunno1
Man is forever solving the most perplexing problems as he ventures ever further into the unknown. But where are the outer limits of his ingenuity? Will he ever encounter a problem, a Gordian Knot, which he cannot ultimately cut?

--GLPPower--
captain anatine
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11/18/2019 02:38 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
I'm in Japan right now. I am happy to tell you CNN international is no longer in any hotel rooms in
Japan or Thialand.. replaced by FOX OR El Jezera..
On one can watch beheadline news
Zorwog

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11/18/2019 02:46 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Wish we could turn it off everywhere. Hotels have it playing 24/7 in the elevators. Even gas stations now have screens at the gas pumps running CNN. It's insidious.
~BigBlock~

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11/18/2019 02:57 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
chuckle

Its a pine
Man is forever solving the most perplexing problems as he ventures ever further into the unknown. But where are the outer limits of his ingenuity? Will he ever encounter a problem, a Gordian Knot, which he cannot ultimately cut?

--GLPPower--
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2019 03:01 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
it leads me to another off hand topic? wtf is a cockle?
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


shellfish
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
The Babylon Bee has the best satire
Contemplating Freedom
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11/18/2019 03:06 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Who is really winning here? Paying to turn off known fake news? CNN should outright be abolished.
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2019 03:08 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
I worked for several international airlines years ago and haven't flown since 1994. I don't trust myself not to knock out any TSA agent who touches me.
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2019 03:25 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Who is really winning here? Paying to turn off known fake news? CNN should outright be abolished.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75992367


I'd prefer they were run out of business


by the simple democratic process of switching them off

but paying to switch them off - that is delightful


although I don't expect the airports to abolish it yet - not when switching off is making SO much revenue :)



but the message relayed by all those quarters

that's priceless :)
Anonymous Coward
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11/18/2019 03:35 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
How do you know the money being made from this isn't going right back to CNN?
Vasily

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11/18/2019 03:42 AM

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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
because it is satire?
CitizenPerth  (OP)

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11/18/2019 03:45 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
because it is satire?
 Quoting: Vasily


rockon
It's life as we know it, but only just.
[link to citizenperth.wordpress.com]
sic ut vos es vos should exsisto , denego alius vicis facio vos change , exsisto youself , proprie
Miss Bunny Swan

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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Afro
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11/18/2019 04:01 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
I love it.
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11/18/2019 04:04 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
CK Dexter Haven

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11/18/2019 05:03 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
[snip]

WORLD—Airports around the world are reporting record revenues after introducing a long-awaited feature: the ability to turn off CNN on television sets in their terminals.

For just one quarter, you can turn off CNN for a full fifteen minutes while you're waiting for your flight, leaving you with the "far superior" experience of just staring at a blank screen.

"At long last," said one man waiting for his flight at LaGuardia as he dropped a few dollars' worth of quarters into the "Turn CNN Off" slot. "Honestly, I might fly more now." He's not alone: airports expect a 426% uptick in traveling over the holidays as flyers no longer have to worry about having the droning words of CNN hosts pounded into their heads for hours on a layover.

The feature has been one of the most-requested by travelers along with the dismantling of the TSA and pretzel bags with more than 3 pretzels in them...

... A similar program is being rolled out in hospital waiting rooms throughout the country...

[end snip]

FULL ARTICLE: [babylon bee]/news/airport-revenues-soar-after-allowing-travelers-to-p​ay-to-turn-off-cnn?fbclid=IwAR19XB4kFA_h33QhHCt33OuWBVB7K5uMi​DAEa9bbh0_Q5tOoBjhT1dRQJdY
 Quoting: CitizenPerth

cruisin
CK Dexter Haven

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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
cnnfail
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11/18/2019 05:07 AM

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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Even though the original article is satire, it would probably be true if it were true.
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CK Dexter Haven

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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
Even though the original article is satire, it would probably be true if it were true.
 Quoting: Boaty

truestory
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11/18/2019 05:21 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
I worked for several international airlines years ago and haven't flown since 1994. I don't trust myself not to knock out any TSA agent who touches me.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78176245


I flew Jan 2002 when they were just getting heavy on security. Bought 2 seats so I could carry-on my 2 cats. Told agents who checked carriers (with cats in them) that one was a sweetheart, just be gentle but she would never scratch or bite. The other one would be fine if they were careful with her. The one TSA agent said if she scratched or bit him she'd be in trouble. I told him if he hurt my cat I'd hurt him (& he could tell I meant it too!) He stared at me a second, gently checked my cats & bags (no problems, except I thought I'd be arrested for threatening TSA!), & let us continue onto the plane...Hate TSA & overbearing flight attendants that think they're god (most are lovely-just takes one though...)
"Doom! Doom! Doom! Something seems to whisper it in the very dark trees of America." - DH Lawrence

"If any question why we died, tell them because our father's lied" Epitaphs of War, Rudyard Kipling (lost son in WW1)
AltSwede

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11/18/2019 05:28 AM
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Re: LMFAO!!! Airport Revenues Soar After Allowing Travelers To Pay To Turn Off CNN : It warms my cockles!!! :P
it leads me to another off hand topic? wtf is a cockle?
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


1dunno1
 Quoting: ~BigBlock~


Seem to be a lot of things?
[link to www.urbandictionary.com (secure)]
AltSwede





GLP