Mental breakdown imminent

What year were you Born in Op?

yes I know but now please hear my voice.
doesn't matter what you've done, you are loved
that other voice wants you to kill yourself because you are a child of the MOST HIGH and the voice is jealous of you because you are precious to HIM
I do not say this lightly but after many years of searching, I believe it with all my heart
hang in there and listen for the voice that loves you

Idiot alert

And that would be me....


Listen, you need to get your behind into a rehab, for at least six months.

And don't balk at six months, it'll probably take a year.

It's the only thing you have control over right now....your future.

You WILL call a doctor to help, go to the ER....do anything to get your butt into a rehab, this week.

I hate to say it, but I don't think you're going to make it, otherwise.

So, tell me, straight up honestly....do you really want to die?

Heh, think about it hard. You're alive now. You can make a choice yet.


My heart to yours....


And if you're trollin', I'm going to drop an energy bomb on your head. Promise.

Thank you..I am trying

I have done 2 6 month programs a three month and have had years of sobriety.

I got hurt real bad. You wouldn't believe me...perhaps I will talk about it another day. Anyways...im desperate. There are people after me..last time I went to rehab I was assaulted in my sleep and I don't know if ill ever be okay after what they did to me

Why so many problems in your life? Do you know why?

Seriously, if you've done it before, you can do it again. Addicts sometimes fall off the wagon after years of sobriety. Do you know what your triggers are?

And I'll tell ya: I was sexually assaulted in my sleep as a wee one. It's my first memory in life....heh, I got over it. It took work, but I did heal the pain.

I'm here to tell you, even just about the worst CAN BE risen above. Lovey, you've just got to want to rise.

I don't know how old you are. I don't know what your history is....but I do know that there is a part of you that would like to live, and to live well.

Stop drowning that out with drugs and discontent. It's your saving grace.

Idk whatever happens happens.

I've been clean for a couple weeks..too afraid to touch the stuff.
It made me so sick too...I was throwing up blood and it hurt to eat solid food.

Just join our lost Monastery for hapless people.

That's a good start....


You need to get at the root of what is ailing you, lovey. You're not going to be good to go until you do.

I want to live so bad

But I can't seem too

I am trying so hard...idk

Thank you

Op wow you are strong listen it sounds like you need grief therapy and some therapy for the trauma of your mental injury. Notice I didn’t say mental illness

Just learned that recently watching a documentary I think it was called Cracked.

Maybe try to get in the witness protection program and start clean? You have options op.

The doc was called Cracked Up about Saturday Night Live comedian Darrel Hammond. After childhood trauma and years of hurt he seems okay now.

You need to get someplace safe, where you have no access to drugs.

You must clean up your consciousness clock, it's a critical mess. That's why you can only say, "idk."

Maybe..

Do you know how to eat a whale? One bite at a time.



You're in good company here. And you want to be better. That's over half the battle won right there.

A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. Just one foot in front of the other. Over and over, and before you know it you've gotten somewhere!

Any way you look at it OP, there are still good people in this world and you can still turn it all around, even after all the stupid decisions and shitty things that happened to you. There are may others like you who came out for the better on the other side. Good luck, and I mean it.

Heh, I love-love Lance, but he's tipsy more than a little.


I imagine you two would be a dangerous combo.....


Love you, Lance....but you know I'm right.

I always identified with comedians and once had dreams of becoming one. Then things happened...I will check it out thanks

This video always makes me tear up...

Thank you

True....very true.

Just because I'm tipsy doesn't negate my hapless monastery. It's functional at least. 4 beers in...Maybe I should drop some acid now?

Got me too..

But really, the OP needs to basically isolate himself, and really, really get to know himself.

Easier said, than done. A necessity if one is to make it out alive, though.

This video is my absolute favorite. I watch it frequently. I hope that the OP watches it. Hang in there, OP!

Hmmm..you are right. I might try that.

This is another go-to fav of mine when I'm feeling down. Not nearly as teary.

Do any of us make it out alive?