I need help. I'm dealing with mental illness in my household and don't know what to do. | |
@MoonPie
User ID: 28698215 United States 06/17/2020 10:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You best get a new gf. All the warnings are there. Heed them. “Shallow men believe in luck or in circumstance. Strong men believe in cause and effect.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson “Three great forces rule the world: stupidity, fear and greed.” — Albert Einstein. "Truth does not mind being questioned. A lie does" — Janis Ian |
FissionSurplus
User ID: 77947181 United States 06/17/2020 10:25 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My gf has lost her mind during this pandemic. Quoting: SoberLife She just put a BLM sign in the back of her car. In her side window she also put a sign that reads "White silence is white violence". We live in a nice neighborhood. Its like painting a bullseye on the front of my house. I made her take them down. She went to a BLM protest locally. Where some wacko convinced her to believe the phrase "all lives matter" is racist and is a hate term directed at the BLM movement. I asked her how she thinks this makes her teenage son feel...asking her if she intends to make him feel guilty for having white skin. The question was over her head. She can't understand this concept. She's vulnerable to propaganda. She's scared to death of the coronavirus. Has barely left the house for 10 weeks. Hasn't worked a minute. I've been working 60 hours a week to get us by. During the time i believe a preexisting mental health condition has come out. She'll talk nonstop for hours, changing the subject of the conversation so rapidly that what she says doesn't make sense. Contradicts herself from one sentence to the other. Manic depressive, with no regard to reasoning or logic. If I disagree with her on any subject, she takes it as an attack on her character. If she cries, she'll cry for 5 hours straight. If she gets excited about something, she'll become compulsive and stay up for 2-3 days straight (no drugs). I've asked her to talk to a therapist or see a doctor. She'll agree and then act like we never had the conversation. If I try to push it, she'll go into the crying stage and corner me until she breaks me down. The only way I get any peace is to completely leave her alone and let her chase whatever crazy ideas she has and not hold her accountable. Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? I'm at a loss on where to go from here. PS- I want to help her. I've been with her over 5 years, and she has never been like this. Giving her the boot and leaving her out to dry is not an option. Stress often brings out mental illness which previously a person was able to hide. From what I can gather, she is bipolar and is in the high point of mania, right before she goes crashing down into bipolar depression. If she has NOT made homicidal or suicidal ideations, she cannot be petitioned for mental health intervention. Unfortunately, if she doesn't agree to help, you have no choice but to either ride with it, or leave. It doesn't appear that she is able to reason in her mind right now. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 79042121 United States 06/17/2020 10:30 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | seriously, wet the ground and try to get her to lay on it, the ideal is to ground her or block any signal. that doesn't take long and cost little. no need to fill her up on drugs unless she truly needs them. what will 30 min do? if it doesn't help you have a spot on the lawn that got watered and she is no worse off. ask her if she feels vibrations that she cant explain. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 78743383 United States 06/17/2020 10:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My gf has lost her mind during this pandemic. Quoting: SoberLife She just put a BLM sign in the back of her car. In her side window she also put a sign that reads "White silence is white violence". We live in a nice neighborhood. Its like painting a bullseye on the front of my house. I made her take them down. She went to a BLM protest locally. Where some wacko convinced her to believe the phrase "all lives matter" is racist and is a hate term directed at the BLM movement. I asked her how she thinks this makes her teenage son feel...asking her if she intends to make him feel guilty for having white skin. The question was over her head. She can't understand this concept. She's vulnerable to propaganda. She's scared to death of the coronavirus. Has barely left the house for 10 weeks. Hasn't worked a minute. I've been working 60 hours a week to get us by. During the time i believe a preexisting mental health condition has come out. She'll talk nonstop for hours, changing the subject of the conversation so rapidly that what she says doesn't make sense. Contradicts herself from one sentence to the other. Manic depressive, with no regard to reasoning or logic. If I disagree with her on any subject, she takes it as an attack on her character. If she cries, she'll cry for 5 hours straight. If she gets excited about something, she'll become compulsive and stay up for 2-3 days straight (no drugs). I've asked her to talk to a therapist or see a doctor. She'll agree and then act like we never had the conversation. If I try to push it, she'll go into the crying stage and corner me until she breaks me down. The only way I get any peace is to completely leave her alone and let her chase whatever crazy ideas she has and not hold her accountable. Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? I'm at a loss on where to go from here. PS- I want to help her. I've been with her over 5 years, and she has never been like this. Giving her the boot and leaving her out to dry is not an option. Divorce the crazy bitch. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 71594995 United States 06/17/2020 10:43 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 76815623 Canada 06/18/2020 10:40 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You sound like a decent caring man, but I dealt with mental illness in two occasions in the past and it was emotionally draining and once they know you want out they will do everything they can to destroy you further. If she does not get help bow out and move on. If you want to be the knight in shining armour prepare yourself for a roller coaster life because that is all you will get. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 55318578 United States 06/18/2020 11:02 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | From my perspective of living with an adult child suffering from similar symptoms this is what I've found that works the best. 1.Clean up her diet...no sugar, processed foods etc. Eat organic as much as possible...look into Keto diet. 2.Supplement with CBD and/or medical marijuana for both anxiety and sleep issues. 3.Limit access to TV/media. 4.Excersice...walking, hiking..any outdoor activities. 5.Prayer and seeking the Lord! |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 72472549 United States 06/18/2020 11:05 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Bobii User ID: 78980994 Australia 06/18/2020 11:25 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You need to book a consultation with a psychologist ( not a psychiatrist) tell your wife,take her along regardless of her state.if she’s crying or raging during the appointment then so be it.it is what it is, dude. Don’t waste time, she could be on the point if tipping off the edge making recovery much harder. Use the tac that if she is ok it will only be a discussion, if she needs help she is seeing the right person to deal with it. Take the approach that it’s happening. If possible get friend to come along on the day. Good luck. Don’t delay. |
MR. D User ID: 72775067 United States 06/18/2020 11:52 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | From my perspective of living with an adult child suffering from similar symptoms this is what I've found that works the best. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55318578 1.Clean up her diet...no sugar, processed foods etc. Eat organic as much as possible...look into Keto diet. 2.Supplement with CBD and/or medical marijuana for both anxiety and sleep issues. 3.Limit access to TV/media. 4.Excersice...walking, hiking..any outdoor activities. 5.Prayer and seeking the Lord! BRAVO !!! ^ this , plus , take a hard look at the ingrediants in the food ,,, in the diet . POISONS can mess with endocrine sys, ,,, which control hormones ,,, which exhibit bi-polar symptoms. pharma meds from shrinks or doctors just treat symptoms ,,, not the problem . |
concerned observer User ID: 79034642 United States 06/18/2020 12:07 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
RubyV82
User ID: 79027484 United Kingdom 06/18/2020 12:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Sounds like her stress response has gone and she’s stuck in fight or flight response or the sympathetic nervous system response. The opposite end to that spectrum is the parasympathetic response - rest and digest instead of fight or flight. Both parasympathetic and sympathetic response are part of the ANS or autonomic nervous system. It’s powered by acetylcholine.....if it goes into overdrive you should supplement with choline as it will help get back into rest and digest more. If anyone is choline deficient because of not getting in their diet or for genetic reasons not being able to process it from food, the body has to find the acetylcholine from somewhere so it basically breaks down brain cells to get it. It turns into Alzheimer’s eventually. Biochemistry Not bipolar Be understanding. Times are very weird. I’ve had a couple of moments where I thought the lockdown/pandemic/all this crazy shit was gonna tip me into major sympathetic response. The only thing that helps me is choline. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 78268077 Canada 06/18/2020 01:10 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 38462272 United States 06/18/2020 01:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Mercury has just gone retrograde which will disrupt communications for the next few weeks. If she won’t or can’t work can she stay inside and do something quietly like read or clean? You could try cbd oil; maybe that would relax her. Will she drink lol sorry to suggest. You could pick up some red meat ; that might be calming. You might even read Nutrition and Your Mind by George Watson. He says it has to do with how your cells process food; literally, it’s a metabolic issue. He suggests some people can’t maintain their blood sugar without eating red meat. You could research the carnivore diet on you tube; there’s a lot of mental health recovery stories. |
jkm1864
User ID: 77810344 United States 06/18/2020 01:31 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I dunno man. Borderline personality? Histrionic personality disorder? Quoting: Anonymous Coward 66141563 I've noticed that a lot of mental illnesses that manifest in the frantic mania, crying, or acting like a child are usually rooted in childhood trauma. People get emotionally frozen in a certain age, like arrested development. Then again - Some bipolar folks (Depending on the types) have short mania cycle and others very brief. I'm no doctor but I bet it's super easy to diagnose for someone who knows their shit! That's why I'm very adamant that children need a mother and father plus a nice boring childhood. I never had a father and I probably went to a different school each year until I graduated. I learned one thing as a child that if I get to close to someone life always takes them away and I admit I'm fucking damaged goods. I put up with a lot of bullshit in My last relationship because I wanted My daughter to have a better childhood meaning She has lived in the same house for so far 16 years. I don't know if She will turn out better but I tried and that's all I can do as a parent. Pussy Grabber Extraordinaire |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 14385938 United States 06/18/2020 01:49 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Unfortunately, my friend has been on anti-depressants, etc.. off and on for years and is not bipolar. After Trump's election, she cried in my living room and told me he was going to put her in a concentration camp and she would die there. Saying to me, 'don't you care that I'll die?". Since one of my soapbox issues now is the politicization of the medical studies and she constantly repeats that Trump is getting rich off hydroxychloriquine, we had intense words and have both backed away. This after 50 years of going through extreme life events with each other's support. Facts no longer matter. There has been an appeal to emotionalism that is too appealing to some people. It has become an addiction. Also, I have noted that HOW one gets ones news is very key to what one believes about an issue. So there is definitely something to that. Gee... if we had an EMP would it knock out all the towers, too? |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 78363501 United States 06/18/2020 02:32 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I cannot believe people are recommending taking her to therapists. The mental health industry is a fuck hole of dumb and evil people. She will come out of that appointment having been told that: 1) she is with a racist 2) her conduct and beliefs are perfectly normal and correct 3) she needs to leave YOU, get away from the evil racist who refuses to embrace this new normal You have two choices: stay and deal with it, or refuse to live with someone who is so opposed to your belief system and such a sucker for propaganda. Sounds like you're inclined to suck it up and martyr yourself for her. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 14992014 United States 06/18/2020 02:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Help her start a garden. Insist on it if you have to. The sun, soil, and exercise will do her a world of good and she’ll be a productive and contributing member of the household even if she’s not working a regular job. |
Swearbox
User ID: 77978222 Canada 06/18/2020 02:45 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Get rid and don't look back...you'll get nothing but further frustration and stress by trying to fix what the average Joe cannot fix by appeasement and 'going along with it'. Chill out, its just a Lancashire Rose |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 77031197 United States 06/18/2020 02:54 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Even a normal healthy minded woman will still act without regard to logic. Logic is the mans realm, emotion is the woman's realm. They will always act with emotion first, logic second. The lack of logic in a woman's thinking is not a mental illness. She is a woman and simply lacks skills of logic just as a man lacks the same emotional depth as a woman. |
SoberLife
(OP) User ID: 78649370 United States 06/18/2020 09:49 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | In all sincerity, she sounds like she is having a break down of some sort. The stress of this pandemic has taken its toll on a lot of people. Now, we are being told to feel guilty for being "privileged". It is a lot for people to handle who are not extremely strong mentally. Quoting: Mother Knows Best I have seen people freak out over these situations that I know in my personal life that I never dreamed would react that way. If she is willing to go talk to someone I would recommend it. The insomnia and mania definitely sound like a mental issue. In the moments she will agree to see a doctor, I would immediately make an appointment for her. Also, if there is a family member or friend who she respects the opinion of I would try to get them to talk to her. Amyone else who can help keep her accountable for getting care from a doctor. Praying for you and her! Good for you for not saying ok, it's going badly, I'm bailing. Also, good for you to think of her son, and wanting to help him too, and thinking what this is doing to him. Sounds like she needs to see a therapist; probably needs Rx; which is better than the alternative, i.e. staying like she is, or even suicide, the ultimate end game when a person is depressed or mentally ill. It would be so good if she could get really out of the news/propaganda whirlwind for awhile. I''m sure the lockdown has affected so many of us, much worse than the virus. I'll pray for you and her and her son. God bless you Thank you for your kind words |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 78886032 United States 06/18/2020 09:53 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 57414619 United Kingdom 06/18/2020 10:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | You didn't know?. Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, "Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand." - Matthew 12:26 Therefore, everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father, who is in heaven. But whoever will have denied me before men, I also will deny before my Father, who is in heaven. Do not think that I came to send peace upon the earth. I came, not to send peace, but the sword [as the great Anti-Christ]. For I came to divide a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And the enemies of a man will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever loves son or daughter above me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take up his cross and follow me [as the great Anti-Christ] is not worthy of me [Elijah the prophet]. Whoever finds his life, will lose it. And whoever will have lost his life for my sake, shall find it. Whoever receives you, receives me. And whoever receives me, receives him who sent me. Whoever receives a prophet, in the name of a prophet, shall receive the reward of a prophet. And whoever receives the just in the name of the just shall receive the reward of the just. And whoever shall give, even to one of the least of these, a cup of cold water [of wisdom and knowledge] to drink, solely in the name of a disciple: Amen I say to you, he shall not lose his reward.” - Jesus in Matthew 10:24-42 |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 70637860 United States 06/18/2020 10:16 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Its not mental illness, she got the "Jungle Fever". Is she "Baby Momma" material ? This is kinda like when the movie "Dancing with Wolfs" came out, huge amount of women were throwing themselves at Natives all around the country.....even the skid row native bums in Seattle were getting action from the suburban white chicks looking for a hook up. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 22180535 United States 06/18/2020 10:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | My gf has lost her mind during this pandemic. Quoting: SoberLife She just put a BLM sign in the back of her car. In her side window she also put a sign that reads "White silence is white violence". We live in a nice neighborhood. Its like painting a bullseye on the front of my house. I made her take them down. She went to a BLM protest locally. Where some wacko convinced her to believe the phrase "all lives matter" is racist and is a hate term directed at the BLM movement. I asked her how she thinks this makes her teenage son feel...asking her if she intends to make him feel guilty for having white skin. The question was over her head. She can't understand this concept. She's vulnerable to propaganda. She's scared to death of the coronavirus. Has barely left the house for 10 weeks. Hasn't worked a minute. I've been working 60 hours a week to get us by. During the time i believe a preexisting mental health condition has come out. She'll talk nonstop for hours, changing the subject of the conversation so rapidly that what she says doesn't make sense. Contradicts herself from one sentence to the other. Manic depressive, with no regard to reasoning or logic. If I disagree with her on any subject, she takes it as an attack on her character. If she cries, she'll cry for 5 hours straight. If she gets excited about something, she'll become compulsive and stay up for 2-3 days straight (no drugs). I've asked her to talk to a therapist or see a doctor. She'll agree and then act like we never had the conversation. If I try to push it, she'll go into the crying stage and corner me until she breaks me down. The only way I get any peace is to completely leave her alone and let her chase whatever crazy ideas she has and not hold her accountable. Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? I'm at a loss on where to go from here. PS- I want to help her. I've been with her over 5 years, and she has never been like this. Giving her the boot and leaving her out to dry is not an option. It is time to depart, my friend. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 78736552 Canada 06/18/2020 10:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 47276522 United States 06/18/2020 10:34 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 79022309 United States 06/18/2020 10:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Does she have family? Mother, father, etc? What about the father of the teenage son? Those people are more likely able to help her. You only know her 5 years. That is long enough to become deeply attached to a person but her family will have more influence. How about turning off the media? PLENTY of activities that can replace the media mind programming. Break the addiction. Try to talk it out without going into defense mode. Try to convey your thoughts and emotions. Don't hold back how you feel. Sounds like she is sheltered. You mentioned living in a nice neighborhood. You go to work. She stays home. Has she ever lived through financial difficulty or has she been treated like a princess all her life? |
NOLAangel
User ID: 78128369 United States 06/18/2020 10:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | In all sincerity, she sounds like she is having a break down of some sort. The stress of this pandemic has taken its toll on a lot of people. Now, we are being told to feel guilty for being "privileged". It is a lot for people to handle who are not extremely strong mentally. Quoting: Mother Knows Best I have seen people freak out over these situations that I know in my personal life that I never dreamed would react that way. If she is willing to go talk to someone I would recommend it. The insomnia and mania definitely sound like a mental issue. In the moments she will agree to see a doctor, I would immediately make an appointment for her. Also, if there is a family member or friend who she respects the opinion of I would try to get them to talk to her. Amyone else who can help keep her accountable for getting care from a doctor. Praying for you and her! ^^^^This Sober, If this is new behavior, it sure does look like she is having a nervous breakdown. I am also curious how old she is. Sometimes mental illnesses, like manic depression onsets in mid life. You need to get her help. :InMyPrayers5: |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 53652834 United States 06/18/2020 11:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | In 5 years of a relationship people change. Sometimes it’s not a big deal, but this sounds like a big deal. Sorry but my jaded opinion is to walk away. It’s going to get worse. Have you ever changed a crazy liberal’s ideas with factual information? I didn’t think so. |