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| 12:58 PM | ||
| Users Online Now: 2,182 (Who's On?) | Visitors Today: 770,485 | |
| Pageviews Today: 1,267,522 | Threads Today: 500 | Posts Today: 8,710 |
| 12:58 PM | ||
Awakening | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923  France09/28/2020 10:37 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334  United States09/28/2020 10:38 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Sicksent Yes and no. I have no choice after I started. I was beaten beyond measure. Hence my disappearance and retreat. In every direction I chose to look into, I only saw defeat. For a time, I lost EVERYTHING. A single moment started it. In every direction the light grew dimmer if deciding to trod any paths away from me. I isolated, and was torn apart in every way. When I found any type of solace or succor, I clung to it like a needy beggar, like a junkie... when nothing worked to change my condition, I began destroying everything around me. Pain, meet PAIN. Fucking A. Sounds exactly like what I went through. Did you ever watch the dismantling of your old self/conceptual body of substance (I dont know how else to describe it). That went on for over a week for me. It was brutal. I think we all go through a different "desemblence" of our self. I think that it becomes a crescendo of inner turmoil, that for the fact we are eternal, would rend us asunder into meaningless fading echoes of what our lives have tried to attain. But for the idea we are eternal, the meaningless becomes known to be a false construction imposed upon us from our external experiences. Being rent asunder, yet finding ourselves still able to attain sovereignty if only having the willpower and fortitude to carry on, well...we find meaning and grace being fat greater than any pain we are meant to endure. We have MEANING. And it is greater than we can imagine. We can't grasp that. But we WILL experience it. what is the spectrum for our lives to have meaning, are we are jumping straight into the philosophical? For me, the philosophical found the breath of life and waged a personal war. It is the cost of which I speak of. ...ah, what the hell |
| Xenophon
User ID: 75699747  Australia09/28/2020 10:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | During those four years did you go into a state of non-being? Quoting: Xenophon Congrats on making it through I went through that prior to the four years. During the 4, if death availed me, I would not have struggled. Thanks for sharing, perfectly understandable when undergoing herculean trials the 3rd shaking |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 10:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | chad, don't allow interference in you responses comport yourself to the thought! Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76932923 I see more, Alex. My responses are comported as they should be. bickle was an idiot, probably still is! i see that he disturbs you! Not at all. Reciprocity of invoking familiarity of first names, is all. Don't read too much into it. You'll find yourself in a loop. ...ah, what the hell |
| Hub Cap Halo
User ID: 28408601 United States09/28/2020 10:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923 France09/28/2020 10:44 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Anonymous Coward 73043282 Fucking A. Sounds exactly like what I went through. Did you ever watch the dismantling of your old self/conceptual body of substance (I dont know how else to describe it). That went on for over a week for me. It was brutal. I think we all go through a different "desemblence" of our self. I think that it becomes a crescendo of inner turmoil, that for the fact we are eternal, would rend us asunder into meaningless fading echoes of what our lives have tried to attain. But for the idea we are eternal, the meaningless becomes known to be a false construction imposed upon us from our external experiences. Being rent asunder, yet finding ourselves still able to attain sovereignty if only having the willpower and fortitude to carry on, well...we find meaning and grace being fat greater than any pain we are meant to endure. We have MEANING. And it is greater than we can imagine. We can't grasp that. But we WILL experience it. what is the spectrum for our lives to have meaning, are we are jumping straight into the philosophical? For me, the philosophical found the breath of life and waged a personal war. It is the cost of which I speak of. your current avatar is a definition of philosophical, in that anyone can see what they wish in it! i see a quizzical expression! |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923 France09/28/2020 10:46 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | chad, don't allow interference in you responses comport yourself to the thought! Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76932923 I see more, Alex. My responses are comported as they should be. bickle was an idiot, probably still is! i see that he disturbs you! Not at all. Reciprocity of invoking familiarity of first names, is all. Don't read too much into it. You'll find yourself in a loop. well aware of your inclination to brush things under the rug. loops are only beneficial if you wish to remain static! |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 10:49 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If you descend to the very bottom you can use that as a springboard to shoot up faster to the very top. The things that don't kill us really do make us stronger if we can grow from them. I'm sorry about the pain that you have been through the last few years but I hope that you utilize it all for tremendous strength.  It was what it was. Was it worth it? Not to me. But, it is what it is. ...ah, what the hell |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 10:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Sicksent Yes and no. I have no choice after I started. I was beaten beyond measure. Hence my disappearance and retreat. In every direction I chose to look into, I only saw defeat. For a time, I lost EVERYTHING. A single moment started it. In every direction the light grew dimmer if deciding to trod any paths away from me. I isolated, and was torn apart in every way. When I found any type of solace or succor, I clung to it like a needy beggar, like a junkie... when nothing worked to change my condition, I began destroying everything around me. Pain, meet PAIN. Fucking A. Sounds exactly like what I went through. Did you ever watch the dismantling of your old self/conceptual body of substance (I dont know how else to describe it). That went on for over a week for me. It was brutal. I think we all go through a different "desemblence" of our self. I think that it becomes a crescendo of inner turmoil, that for the fact we are eternal, would rend us asunder into meaningless fading echoes of what our lives have tried to attain. But for the idea we are eternal, the meaningless becomes known to be a false construction imposed upon us from our external experiences. Being rent asunder, yet finding ourselves still able to attain sovereignty if only having the willpower and fortitude to carry on, well...we find meaning and grace being fat greater than any pain we are meant to endure. We have MEANING. And it is greater than we can imagine. We can't grasp that. But we WILL experience it. what is the spectrum for our lives to have meaning, are we are jumping straight into the philosophical? Sovereignty ...ah, what the hell |
| Michael.
User ID: 44533740 United States09/28/2020 10:51 PM  Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| SFAV
User ID: 77277365 United States09/28/2020 10:55 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 10:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 10:57 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Sicksent I think we all go through a different "desemblence" of our self. I think that it becomes a crescendo of inner turmoil, that for the fact we are eternal, would rend us asunder into meaningless fading echoes of what our lives have tried to attain. But for the idea we are eternal, the meaningless becomes known to be a false construction imposed upon us from our external experiences. Being rent asunder, yet finding ourselves still able to attain sovereignty if only having the willpower and fortitude to carry on, well...we find meaning and grace being fat greater than any pain we are meant to endure. We have MEANING. And it is greater than we can imagine. We can't grasp that. But we WILL experience it. what is the spectrum for our lives to have meaning, are we are jumping straight into the philosophical? For me, the philosophical found the breath of life and waged a personal war. It is the cost of which I speak of. your current avatar is a definition of philosophical, in that anyone can see what they wish in it! i see a quizzical expression! A mirror? ...ah, what the hell |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 77983873 United States09/28/2020 10:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923 France09/28/2020 11:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76932923 what is the spectrum for our lives to have meaning, are we are jumping straight into the philosophical? For me, the philosophical found the breath of life and waged a personal war. It is the cost of which I speak of. your current avatar is a definition of philosophical, in that anyone can see what they wish in it! i see a quizzical expression! A mirror? youre getting warm! |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923 France09/28/2020 11:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Hub Cap Halo
User ID: 28408601 United States09/28/2020 11:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:07 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Problem is, you cannot quantify it. It comes in degrees, that blooms into different stages of how you respond to or experience your inner life. When that begins, it feels like the entire world is changing with you because it's inside you, the changes. It IS you. Quoting: Sicksent ...ah, what the hell |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 76932923 France09/28/2020 11:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:11 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Hub Cap Halo
User ID: 28408601 United States09/28/2020 11:13 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Yes and no. I have no choice after I started. I was beaten beyond measure. Hence my disappearance and retreat. In every direction I chose to look into, I only saw defeat. For a time, I lost EVERYTHING. A single moment started it. In every direction the light grew dimmer if deciding to trod any paths away from me. I isolated, and was torn apart in every way. When I found any type of solace or succor, I clung to it like a needy beggar, like a junkie... when nothing worked to change my condition, I began destroying everything around me. Pain, meet PAIN. I STILL FIGHT LIKE HELL but am i just fighting myself? i wonder [link to www.youtube.com (secure)] Watching through the Lattice |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:21 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The "fighting" brought pain. The deeper I fought, the more the pain spread. The more it flowed out from me, scarring the things I love more than myself. In every direction, as I said earlier, the light grew dimmer. Every decision, every action, no matter... the light grew dimmer. I lost everything. There was ONLY ME. And I burned. ...ah, what the hell |
| Jb User ID: 79384339  Canada09/28/2020 11:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:28 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 75474946  Netherlands09/28/2020 11:28 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 75474946 Netherlands09/28/2020 11:29 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Hub Cap Halo
User ID: 28408601 United States09/28/2020 11:30 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | you where the first - i remember-years ago when i fell into the abyss [link to www.youtube.com (secure)] Watching through the Lattice |
| Sicksent
(OP) User ID: 77867334 United States09/28/2020 11:33 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | you where the first - i remember-years ago when i fell into the abyss Quoting: Hub Cap Halo [link to www.youtube.com (secure)] Wow... brings back old memories ...ah, what the hell |
