I get your wife has mental issues but so do you. You're obviously mildly depressed about your living situation and I'm sure you realize that.
A divorce means you get to live the rest of your life in whatever capacity you can. Your wife will be looked after by whoever she can afford to have care for her and the same goes for you.
Just take your name off the deed of the house and tell the bank it belongs to her now, it's what she wants. She'll get it in the divorce and if you die before she does, she'll get the house anyway.
Don't think of the divorce as freeing your wife only, it also frees you. You could remote work from a trailer by the sea in Mexico or SE Asia.
You realize things have to change and what has to happen but you're still hesitant. That's the only reason why you have cause for complaint, not your wife, not her friends, not the bank issue.
I don't understand why you'd spend another day being miserable when you could just say, "It's over, thanks for the memories."
Quoting: NowIhavetothinkofaname You are correct. I do suffer from depression from this relationship.
I feel I've an obligation to not abandon her despite being miserable.
I'm neither unwanted nor unpopular. My doctor's FNP called after their office closed and talked perhaps five minutes about a prescription for a CGM monitor that I sent her an email asking for her to change, and about twenty more minutes about what I'm doing this weekend, what she's doing, how she needs to work Monday, and to have a beer and think of her while I'm off.
Then how much she's looking forward to seeing me when I next stop by their office to get a new DMV form for a handicapped tag for the truck so she can show me the new air purification system they have added to their office.
But I just have old fashioned values and can't be unfaithful or desertive. And yes, I realize I would be very happy with a different, professional, and educated women in my life.
I guess I'm just an idiot and until I come to the realization that any change must come from me I must abide my present situation.
Until then, I'll not post of it. Thank you for giving me that measure of clarity which I lacked.
