In suicide danger zone and nowhere to turn

I've hard a hard life but managed to survive, because there always seemed to be hope for a better tomorrow. Not much success still but hope was enough. Even despite the covid hopelessness and the inevitable fascist takeover and slavery.

But since my SO passed a few months ago, it's as if something broke in me. I couldn't take care of myself, just enough to survive but now it's as if that bottom has been pulled off and there's no support. It seems like a one way street straight to death.

The amount of self neglect that I've been exhibiting is at an all-time low or close, but scarier is that I have no will to live anymore. The thing that made me survive much tougher times.

It's like there's nothing standing between me and death.

At least I can vent on GLP without getting stupid advice like seeing a psychologist lol.

How many people in the world are feeling exactly the same

Tuff times

You are correct

Real hope is important

Were praying for ya

God be with you

Im glad you posted this thread

May others be strengthened by it

I've hard a hard life but managed to survive, because there always seemed to be hope for a better tomorrow. Not much success still but hope was enough. Even despite the covid hopelessness and the inevitable fascist takeover and slavery.

But since my SO passed a few months ago, it's as if something broke in me. I couldn't take care of myself, just enough to survive but now it's as if that bottom has been pulled off and there's no support. It seems like a one way street straight to death.

The amount of self neglect that I've been exhibiting is at an all-time low or close, but scarier is that I have no will to live anymore. The thing that made me survive much tougher times.

It's like there's nothing standing between me and death.

At least I can vent on GLP without getting stupid advice like seeing a psychologist lol.

Friend,

Do you have a stable roof over your head? Do you have access to a library that can do interlibrary loans (borrow from all other libraries)?

You might not want to hear this, but I seriously recommend researching philosophy, the lives of the philosophers, the early church fathers, and there are more but I don't want to overwhelm you.

No one is going to understand if you commit suicide, and no one is going to understand if you begin devoting yourself to the history of philosophy while taking notes. The consolation of philosophy might be calling your name.

Never mind the idiot contemporaries, the cesspool of popular 'intellectuals' out there... go way back into the past, into the foundations of the essence of your existence. Make philosophy itself a spiritual exercise.

I am glad to expound on anything here and add further detail/advice, and yes, I have seen peoples' lives saved by rejecting the modern world and not committing suicide, but turning to a life of the mind. It does not require much money at all; just a place to sleep and basic, minimal food, hopefully growing a bank account even with a low-end job so as to cultivate your own personal library.

I wonder if OP is dead. He hasn’t posted since this post. Wouldn’t it be good news if OP is dead. One less cuck beta to deal with. Praise be Darwin. Time to clean the pool. TY op for ending it

Trying to be edgy you cringey little germ.so desperate for reply's, wow you are a loser

Trying to be edgy you cringey little germ.so desperate for reply's, wow you are a loser

Is OP dead.... Do you know? Just curious? Most likely gun shot to head. OP is most likely alive. Another weakling

Is OP dead.... Do you know? Just curious? Most likely gun shot to head. OP is most likely alive. Another weakling

Is OP dead.... Do you know? Just curious? Most likely gun shot to head. OP is most likely alive. Another weakling

Hey,

Yes I have a roof over my head and bible study is something I'm interested in as a non religious person who found Christ last year (before the death of my SO).

The strong possibility that we are in the end times and that all will be good soon is the only thing that still keeps me going. But relying on something that still has a chance of not being true or being the wrong time still bothers me.

Living the life of the mind is definitely something that could work to distance oneself from emotions and focus on ideas. Great idea.

Thanks for the suggestions so far, you are not overwhelming me so do go on.

bible study is something I'm interested in as a non religious person who found Christ last year