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Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.

 
canyouhearmenow?
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09/30/2021 09:39 PM
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Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
i was Gabby. i've been there.

She represents many of us who were caught up in a web of brutality and a 24/7 barrage of denigration.

What is so tragic is that Gabby never got to chapter 5:

Autobiography In Five Chapters.

by Portia Nelson

I

I walk down the street.
There's a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost...
I am hopeless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I'm in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in...it's a habit.
My eyes are open; I know where I am;
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

IV

I walk down the same street.
There's a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

V

I walk down another street.

Last Edited by ShiningLightIntoDarkPlaces on 09/30/2021 10:15 PM
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
Anonymous Coward
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10/02/2021 10:05 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I was Gabby for about a year, all it took was one punch and I was out of there with a newborn. We had been together for 10 years, no incidents. I almost turned to a Dianetics outpost at Madison Square Garden, but moved 2000 miles instead.

hf
canyouhearmenow?  (OP)

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10/02/2021 10:53 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I was Gabby for about a year, all it took was one punch and I was out of there with a newborn. We had been together for 10 years, no incidents. I almost turned to a Dianetics outpost at Madison Square Garden, but moved 2000 miles instead.

hf
 Quoting: pool


What gave you the strength to do so, and where was your destination, if you don't mind me asking?
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
Anonymous Coward
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10/02/2021 10:56 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
What gave you the strength to do so, and where was your destination, if you don't mind me asking?
 Quoting: canyouhearmenow?

I walked away from physical/emotional abuse in my family home, so it was a previously learned lesson to walk away. I moved to where I was hired...needed a job to support my child alone. hf

So, that's experience, financial need, organizational skills, old friends, the need to redefine "safe environment".

hugs
canyouhearmenow?  (OP)

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10/02/2021 11:03 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
What gave you the strength to do so, and where was your destination, if you don't mind me asking?
 Quoting: canyouhearmenow?

I walked away from physical/emotional abuse in my family home, so it was a previously learned lesson to walk away. I moved to where I was hired...needed a job to support my child alone. hf

So, that's experience, financial need, organizational skills, old friends, the need to redefine "safe environment".

hugs
 Quoting: pool


It seems you had some fight in you to do all of that....and with a newborn baby.

That's profoundly powerful -------> "redefining safe environment".
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
SonOfBaconator

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10/02/2021 11:12 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I was Gabby. After participating in a CIA pen pal program at a young age, multiple school oriented programs of dubious nature presented themselves or became court ordered. I was given psychotropic drugs and allowed to be taken out of state with complete strangers at a vulnerable time but made it home ok. Life took a lot of strange turns but I never ended up a psyop thankfully.
Just put your toes on the top. -HB
canyouhearmenow?  (OP)

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10/02/2021 11:22 AM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I was Gabby. After participating in a CIA pen pal program at a young age, multiple school oriented programs of dubious nature presented themselves or became court ordered. I was given psychotropic drugs and allowed to be taken out of state with complete strangers at a vulnerable time but made it home ok. Life took a lot of strange turns but I never ended up a psyop thankfully.
 Quoting: SonOfBaconator


What saved you?
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
Pilgrim001

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10/02/2021 12:09 PM

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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I'm just trying to understand. Are abusers usually Alpha type guys, or do mild mannered betas do it also?

What about abused women? Do you stand in front of the tv on Super bowl sunday and want to talk about your relationship? Do you nag?

Is there any known way for a woman to avoid this? Even for the 1st date?
I don't have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.



Slake Blake
canyouhearmenow?  (OP)

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10/02/2021 12:24 PM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I'm just trying to understand. Are abusers usually Alpha type guys, or do mild mannered betas do it also?

What about abused women? Do you stand in front of the tv on Super bowl sunday and want to talk about your relationship? Do you nag?

Is there any known way for a woman to avoid this? Even for the 1st date?
 Quoting: Pilgrim001


The abuse i'm referring to has nothing to do with the one being abused. It's a predilection, if you will, or a trait already present, most likely in a history of violence or tendencies before the abused one ever meets the abuser.

The abuser is most likely narcissistic to one degree or another.

Regarding the 1st date, the abuser is usually quite charming and flattering, etc.

Last Edited by ShiningLightIntoDarkPlaces on 10/02/2021 12:26 PM
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
NotStarvingActress

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10/02/2021 12:28 PM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
To the previous poster,
What type of woman/man ends up with an alcoholic partner?

Usually one who came from a family where a "heavy drinker's" outrageous actions was ignored or consistently excused.

Children learn not to RUN at the 1st signs a potential partner has a serious drinking problem.


Example, In a high school all girls cooking class a classmate complained that her boyfriend had hit her after an argument.

Another classmate confessed that her father frequently beat up her mother but only when he was drunk and had a hard day at work.

Not one of us said that having "a hard day at work" was NO excuse for beating a partner.

Not one of us told the girl to DUMP her boyfriend ASAP as his physical abuse would only get worse. He obviously thought that it was OK to hit a woman.
ShiningLightIntoDarkP​laces  (OP)

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10/25/2022 10:18 PM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
"I am learning to love the sound of my feet walking away from things not meant for me." -Author Unknown
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
ShiningLightIntoDarkP​laces  (OP)

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10/25/2022 11:05 PM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
i'm so sorry Gabby.



Last Edited by ShiningLightIntoDarkPlaces on 10/25/2022 11:15 PM
"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." -Clive James

Miss Trump yet?

LET IT RAIN.
Anonymous Coward
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07/28/2023 02:41 PM
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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
I was Gabby. After participating in a CIA pen pal program at a young age, multiple school oriented programs of dubious nature presented themselves or became court ordered. I was given psychotropic drugs and allowed to be taken out of state with complete strangers at a vulnerable time but made it home ok. Life took a lot of strange turns but I never ended up a psyop thankfully.
 Quoting: SonOfBaconator


i'm thankful you didn't too. hf
Bob from Chimdale

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07/28/2023 02:55 PM

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Re: Gabby. and the Hole in the Sidewalk.
Mind the gap.


sinkhole





GLP