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Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama

 
American Indian Elder

User ID: 80679716
United States
11/25/2021 04:31 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I accept in advance critics who think my taste is corny, but I loved the sit com Third Rock from the Sun. Space aliens here to study us assumed human bodies and tried to blend in. At Holloween, little humans came to the door and begged for treats so the woman fried a bunch of eggs and dropped them into their bags,or a can of beer.
So when Thanksgiving rolled around, the woman tried harder and even made a menu. She carefully put an unthawed tukey in the oven for an hour (with the giblet bag inside) and proudly cut raw slices off for her guests.

Im a vegetarian with an aversion to fowl and usually just help with clean up and try not to argue unless I have to...Im asking to eat alone in the kitchen not the dining this year as shedding vaccinated people could kill me, a non-vxxd person.
 Quoting: American Indian Elder


IIRC, you are, like me, a bit advanced in years; by no means should you even attend such a gathering, much less assist in any way! That cloud of prions will be permeating the place, and over all the dishes, as well.

Please reconsider attending. I would very much miss your posts here, should you fall ill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 53679540

I decided as well: too much exposure. I will tell vaxxd hubby I have a headache, he wont mind going alone, its his family, and Ive opted out before. I will take an hour long bubble bath, start a fire in the fireplace, put on a Hallmark move and throw cheese pizza in the oven. Maybe a wee glass of champagne....Happy Thanksgiving my dear GLPers.
amdg

Forgiveness means giving up every hope
for a better past,
In exchange for a better future.
AKAllie

User ID: 35267127
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11/25/2021 06:19 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I accept in advance critics who think my taste is corny, but I loved the sit com Third Rock from the Sun. Space aliens here to study us assumed human bodies and tried to blend in. At Holloween, little humans came to the door and begged for treats so the woman fried a bunch of eggs and dropped them into their bags,or a can of beer.
So when Thanksgiving rolled around, the woman tried harder and even made a menu. She carefully put an unthawed tukey in the oven for an hour (with the giblet bag inside) and proudly cut raw slices off for her guests.

Im a vegetarian with an aversion to fowl and usually just help with clean up and try not to argue unless I have to...Im asking to eat alone in the kitchen not the dining this year as shedding vaccinated people could kill me, a non-vxxd person.
 Quoting: American Indian Elder


IIRC, you are, like me, a bit advanced in years; by no means should you even attend such a gathering, much less assist in any way! That cloud of prions will be permeating the place, and over all the dishes, as well.

Please reconsider attending. I would very much miss your posts here, should you fall ill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 53679540

I decided as well: too much exposure. I will tell vaxxd hubby I have a headache, he wont mind going alone, its his family, and Ive opted out before. I will take an hour long bubble bath, start a fire in the fireplace, put on a Hallmark move and throw cheese pizza in the oven. Maybe a wee glass of champagne....Happy Thanksgiving my dear GLPers.
 Quoting: American Indian Elder


That sounds nicehf
plateaus

User ID: 79419723
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11/25/2021 06:56 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I once told my dad (the Col) "fuck you" at the TG dinner table ... about 20 people there ... I still think it was an appropriate response to his bullying ... everyone kept eating (just put their heads down to hide the smirk) bwahahahhahahahaha

I quit going to the family germ-swaps five years ago -
I can love them just as much, from a distance - and be even more thankful - if I don't participate in the ritual stress-fests
 Quoting: Shadow Dance

I find it strange everyone want's to travel on the same day at the same time.
What if we all did that about the bathroom?hiding
plateaus
1r0n4n9el
~*14*~

User ID: 79983911
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11/25/2021 06:58 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Post em here.

Dude up the street set his yard on fire one year. Whole neighborhood was battling the blaze. Dude was stoned out of his mind.

Another time my neighbor decided Thanksgiving day would be a good time to cut down all the pine trees in his front yard. It was HOURS of chain saw noise, all through lunch until well after dark.

Once my mom forgot to defrost the turkey. Then, when we started frying our turkeys, one year we ran out of propane before it was done.

Once we forgot to buy cranberry sauce and people were PISSED.

I'm sure GLP can come up with some epic fails.

Hit me!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79554282


lmsilly
angel2
lilmewish
1r0n4n9el
~*14*~

User ID: 79983911
United States
11/25/2021 07:01 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
One time my girlfriend's mom got drunk and slapped her in the face at the table lol.

My gf was a very timid and quiet girl too, felt bad.
 Quoting: BFD State Line Crosser


sad
angel2
lilmewish
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76811228
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11/25/2021 07:03 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Post em here.

Dude up the street set his yard on fire one year. Whole neighborhood was battling the blaze. Dude was stoned out of his mind.

Another time my neighbor decided Thanksgiving day would be a good time to cut down all the pine trees in his front yard. It was HOURS of chain saw noise, all through lunch until well after dark.

Once my mom forgot to defrost the turkey. Then, when we started frying our turkeys, one year we ran out of propane before it was done.

Once we forgot to buy cranberry sauce and people were PISSED.

I'm sure GLP can come up with some epic fails.

Hit me!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79554282


My dad got food poisoning and ended up in hospital for 4 weeks. We think it was my mom's jello salad....
Catseye

User ID: 80881945
United States
11/25/2021 07:05 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
not much but we had a good laugh in the kitchen

last night we made these small healthy muffins with veggies and a banana

I have this old gas oven but I don’t trust the temperature so I turned it up a bit

when I went to check them, by sticking a knife in to see if it came out clean, it came out with the entire muffin stuck to it, pulled it right out of the muffin tin, because they had gotten a bit dry, lol

still edible but I guess the oven is working better than I thought
Forgive your enemies, it messes with their heads.

Thoughts create, mind them well.
Patagonians

User ID: 81020604
Argentina
11/25/2021 07:05 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I accept in advance critics who think my taste is corny, but I loved the sit com Third Rock from the Sun. Space aliens here to study us assumed human bodies and tried to blend in. At Holloween, little humans came to the door and begged for treats so the woman fried a bunch of eggs and dropped them into their bags,or a can of beer.
So when Thanksgiving rolled around, the woman tried harder and even made a menu. She carefully put an unthawed tukey in the oven for an hour (with the giblet bag inside) and proudly cut raw slices off for her guests.

Im a vegetarian with an aversion to fowl and usually just help with clean up and try not to argue unless I have to...Im asking to eat alone in the kitchen not the dining this year as shedding vaccinated people could kill me, a non-vxxd person.
 Quoting: American Indian Elder


IIRC, you are, like me, a bit advanced in years; by no means should you even attend such a gathering, much less assist in any way! That cloud of prions will be permeating the place, and over all the dishes, as well.

Please reconsider attending. I would very much miss your posts here, should you fall ill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 53679540

I decided as well: too much exposure. I will tell vaxxd hubby I have a headache, he wont mind going alone, its his family, and Ive opted out before. I will take an hour long bubble bath, start a fire in the fireplace, put on a Hallmark move and throw cheese pizza in the oven. Maybe a wee glass of champagne....Happy Thanksgiving my dear GLPers.
 Quoting: American Indian Elder


You're getting more than exposure if your husband is not wearing a rubber.

Straight up vax filled turkey baster inside of you.

Does the old " I have a headache" work when he gets frisky?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 59729713
United States
11/25/2021 07:15 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Post em here.

Dude up the street set his yard on fire one year. Whole neighborhood was battling the blaze. Dude was stoned out of his mind.

Another time my neighbor decided Thanksgiving day would be a good time to cut down all the pine trees in his front yard. It was HOURS of chain saw noise, all through lunch until well after dark.

Once my mom forgot to defrost the turkey. Then, when we started frying our turkeys, one year we ran out of propane before it was done.

Once we forgot to buy cranberry sauce and people were PISSED.

I'm sure GLP can come up with some epic fails.

Hit me!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79554282


I am the "drunk uncle".
Pres. Elect Festus Hoggbottom

User ID: 78382070
United States
11/25/2021 07:17 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
One of these assholes wiped their ass with my bathroom towel! WTF?!
I did it. I did it on purpose. And I'll do it again.
BobbyTheBarbarian

User ID: 80609079
United States
11/25/2021 07:22 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
My wife and I got busted at a work Thanksgiving/Christmas Party having the sex in the upstairs bathroom of her boss's house by her boss. He was a surgeon.

It was the first year we were married. From that day on, every time I saw him just grinned and gave me a wink. I am friends with his son and he was laughing telling some of our friends about it. Said, "Dad thought it was awesome! He would bring it up all the time. Started calling that bathroom the upstairs sex room."

He was a funny old bird.
Be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm.
Patagonians

User ID: 81020604
Argentina
11/25/2021 07:24 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
One of these assholes wiped their ass with my bathroom towel! WTF?!
 Quoting: Pres. Elect Festus Hoggbottom


Swamp ass he had.
RocketScientist

User ID: 78938136
United States
11/25/2021 07:37 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
So I finally asked directly, "do you support the mandates and lockdowns and masks on children ". She would not answer the question. She'd rather see her grandchildren in NAZI camps than give up on CNN lies.
RocketScientist
Ashford

User ID: 75533753
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11/25/2021 07:39 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
EVERY year some jackass burns their house down trying to deep fry a turkey. headlesschxmas
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79780865


I was just going to post this! LOL
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 80771016
United States
11/25/2021 07:42 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
My wife and I got busted at a work Thanksgiving/Christmas Party having the sex in the upstairs bathroom of her boss's house by her boss. He was a surgeon.

It was the first year we were married. From that day on, every time I saw him just grinned and gave me a wink. I am friends with his son and he was laughing telling some of our friends about it. Said, "Dad thought it was awesome! He would bring it up all the time. Started calling that bathroom the upstairs sex room."

He was a funny old bird.
 Quoting: BobbyTheBarbarian
r

Probably jerked off everyday thinking about it the old sick f***
Anonymous Coward
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11/25/2021 07:45 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I am so happy not to deal with large groups of extended family anymore. Once grandparents start dropping and some kids stop coming because you know starting college or life, the dinner table just gets smaller and smaller. Anyways, I can only enjoy small group at a time.

Every year it shrinks and is not down to a doable number of 6 . 2/3rds being my immediate family. A few more years it will be one.

If you are going to make a huge dinner and have shallow conversation with a lot of relatives you barely know anymore, you might as well go and work at a shelter serving meals. That is what I see in my future if not a vacation break.
 Quoting: My Fear


This
Ashford

User ID: 75533753
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11/25/2021 07:49 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
So I finally asked directly, "do you support the mandates and lockdowns and masks on children ". She would not answer the question. She'd rather see her grandchildren in NAZI camps than give up on CNN lies.
 Quoting: RocketScientist


Did your drunk azz trip into the wrong thread? LOL
Westwood1

User ID: 81123509
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11/25/2021 07:50 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I’m the eldest son among 7 siblings with 2 sisters who are older.

Our dad died in 2011 and our mother in late 2018. They truly were the glue that held it all together.

No other sibs were interested in joining the family biz except myself. I ran it for years both before and after pops retired therefore I was privy to things they weren’t. Dad and I did things a certain way and we made lots of money.

When it came time to settle the estate the sibs went batshit nuts with endless group-think assumptions, accusations, etc etc. Finally we chose to liquidate everything and go our separate ways.

Jealousy, greed and resentments have pretty much changed the whole remaining family dynamic and most likely for good among us sibs. It’s not so much that people change in as much as it is that people’s true character finally comes out after others are gone.

They make my skin crawl if we’re being honest.

Last Edited by Westwood1 on 11/25/2021 08:01 AM
Moonflwr0704

User ID: 77717112
United States
11/25/2021 08:00 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
My mother in law just randomly wandered up to my neighbor yesterday who was talking to my husband for a minute out back out in our backyard and told him he was the problem with the world bc he votes democratic. Now mind you she has no was of knowing how this man votes. Lol.
It’s going to be a very long weekend My in laws definitely speak their mind
 Quoting: Moonflwr0704


Maybe you're dumb cumt wife is always gossiping about her neighbors when she talks to her parents and that's how they knew he was a demonrat.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 80771016


You’re a moron
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78038603
11/25/2021 08:01 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
EVERY year some jackass burns their house down trying to deep fry a turkey. headlesschxmas
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 79780865


Only William Shatner can deep-fry a turkey!

headlesschahhh
Earmark1

User ID: 76323006
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11/25/2021 08:06 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
I’m the eldest son among 7 siblings with 2 sisters who are older.

Our dad died in 2011 and our mother in late 2018. They truly were the glue that held it all together.

No other sibs were interested in joining the family biz except myself. I ran it for years both before and after pops retired therefore I was privy to things they weren’t. Dad and I did things a certain way and we made lots of money.

When it came time to settle the estate the sibs went batshit nuts with endless group-think assumptions, accusations, etc etc. Finally we chose to liquidate everything and go our separate ways.

Jealousy, greed and resentments have pretty much changed the whole remaining family dynamic and most likely for good among us sibs. It’s not so much that people change in as much as it is that people’s true character finally comes out after others are gone.

They make my skin crawl if we’re being honest.
 Quoting: Westwood1


Sad story but not uncommon. Just because somebody is related by blood doesn't mean a whole lot. Everyone tolerates each other and once the parents are gone it all comes out. Happened to me too and I never expected it.
Earmark1
Anonymous Coward
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11/25/2021 08:52 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Don't forget about uncle stink finger
Reader.

User ID: 79282394
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11/25/2021 08:52 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Exactly what is a "Tashy" relative???????wtfdid
pool
~the world needs change~

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11/25/2021 09:26 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
when I went to check them, by sticking a knife in to see if it came out clean, it came out with the entire muffin stuck to it, pulled it right out of the muffin tin, because they had gotten a bit dry, lol

still edible but I guess the oven is working better than I thought
 Quoting: Catseye


That's when you pour a little whisky on them and let them soak overnight in a zippy bag.
They've lost their religion, they've lost their parents; their identity lay with the estate.
Newandimproved

User ID: 81103188
Canada
11/25/2021 10:10 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
My mother in law just randomly wandered up to my neighbor yesterday who was talking to my husband for a minute out back out in our backyard and told him he was the problem with the world bc he votes democratic. Now mind you she has no was of knowing how this man votes. Lol.
It’s going to be a very long weekend My in laws definitely speak their mind
 Quoting: Moonflwr0704


Maybe you're your dumb cumt wife is always gossiping about her neighbors when she talks to her parents and that's how they knew he was a demonrat.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 80771016


Do you even read, bro?
"We must be clear that when it comes to atoms, language can be used only as in poetry."--NIELS BOHR
Anonymous Coward
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11/25/2021 11:11 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Thanks for sharing your stories. I get a laugh from our holiday blooper threads.

The past story that sticks out the most in my head and still makes me laugh, was the post about sleeping grandpa's ball hanging out until some one was brave enough to tuck them back in. Can anyone find that old thread and post? LOL

I am old and can not remember a holiday gathering without a major blooper. I would not know where to begin. LOL
Vapor Trails

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11/25/2021 11:18 AM

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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Can’t post anything rn, too busy basting the wife’s turkey!

billclinton1
I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity. ~Edgar Allen Poe

I keep my standards pretty low, that way I’m never disappointed. ~Otis Driftwood

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the deplorable ar-15 nut

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11/25/2021 11:23 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Witch one of you buggers is this?tounge
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A pissed off American Veteran.

A Republic. If You can Keep It.
Anonymous Coward
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11/25/2021 11:27 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Witch one of you buggers is this?tounge
[link to youtu.be (secure)]

 Quoting: the deplorable ar-15 nut


I remember that one.
Someone should post the pic of the tanned turkey in a bikini. I have been so tempted to serve one like that. :)
Anonymous Coward
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United Kingdom
11/25/2021 11:27 AM
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Re: Thanksgiving outtakes! Tashy relatives, drunk uncles, cooking disasters, travel nightmares, neighbor drama
Don't forget about uncle stink finger
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 81199294


angryface

eekalert





GLP