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Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 10:15 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door.

Drop pants and turn round.

Chuck.a.huge brown eye..

Fart or shit...

Slam door.

This was.scrumps favourite.
Happy in Nature

User ID: 84876380
Nicaragua
06/26/2023 10:17 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
My ex husband was brushing his teeth when they rang, so he spit out the toothpaste (no rinsing), grabbed an empty beer can and held it in his hand at 9 30 a.m. He looked like a rabid dog. They said have a nice day and moved on. They didn't even offer to leave a magazine.
Eggcellently Deplorable
Re-Instate Smith-Mundt!

User ID: 52929264
United States
06/26/2023 10:23 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I usually just pretend im not home.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85920016


the truth.
present them facts, and not some printed out pamplhet they are allowed to share.
drown them in truth and they will leave.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85097951


Wish it was that easy dealing with the rapture tards.

Another pedo cult.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85920016




Tell your "visitors" that you are joining the Mormons, and will be baptized in a couple of weeks if they'd like to come (make it more believable by looking up where the nearest "Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints" is located). You'll never see another Witness again!.
"I have come to the conclusion that all news should be treated like 9/11, assume it is a psyop with actors participating in a staged event complete with props, until proven otherwise, in which case assume whatever is being recorded, reported, televised, is distortions/lying by omission/outright lies, until proven otherwise." - Anonymous, 4-13-12
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 10:26 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
My ex husband was brushing his teeth when they rang, so he spit out the toothpaste (no rinsing), grabbed an empty beer can and held it in his hand at 9 30 a.m. He looked like a rabid dog. They said have a nice day and moved on. They didn't even offer to leave a magazine.
 Quoting: Happy in Nature


Im gonna try that one
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 10:43 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door..

Throw carton.of sour milk at them.

Burp loudly.

Slam.door
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 40975638
United States
06/26/2023 10:49 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Answer the door with a cucumber stuck up ya bum.

They never come back.

Worked for Brief.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85923354


Brief does the cucumber thing for free no matter who is at the door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85838695
United States
06/26/2023 10:51 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Just tell them the truth. Their doctrine is false. The 144,000 are the babies Herod sent home. Not defiled. Less than 2 years old. The first fruits of the new covenant.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 10:57 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Answer the door with a cucumber stuck up ya bum.

They never come back.

Worked for Brief.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85923354


Brief does the cucumber thing for free no matter who is at the door.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 40975638


Yeah I know.

Its what gave me.the.idea.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 11:09 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door

Rat test in hand.

Cough profusley and hawk up a.loogi and drool.it.onto the test square...

Watch them.scurry away..

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/26/2023 11:30 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door.

Headbutt them.

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/27/2023 12:03 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door..



Scream then fart.

Slam door
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72712951
United States
06/27/2023 12:11 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Know the bible better than they do and ask them uncomfortable questions.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/27/2023 12:14 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Know the bible better than they do and ask them uncomfortable questions.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72712951


Thats ALMOST as much fun as setting ya pitts onto em..

But not half as funny.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85957012
Canada
06/27/2023 12:16 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I answered the door. It was 2 ladies, one in her 50s and one in her early 20s.
They asked if I believed in God, and what I thought of the Bible.
I told them that I more than believed, that I KNOW within my heart the truth of God. And that I thought the Bible was the Word of God.

They seemed very happy with that answer, and thanked me for my time and left. They were pleasant, and I never encounter someone who wants to talk about God AND also has reverence in their eyes. I liked it, and I hope they return.

I'm not going to join their religion though.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86008888
Brunei
06/27/2023 12:24 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I just tell them i am you wish
Buck Tardwater

User ID: 72884301
United States
06/27/2023 02:35 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I just tell them i am you wish
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 86008888


Or you could skip a step and just put a Mezuzah on the door and they'll never even knock.
Buck Tardwater
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86007779
Australia
06/27/2023 03:17 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I just tell them i am you wish
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 86008888


Or you could skip a step and just put a Mezuzah on the door and they'll never even knock.
 Quoting: Buck Tardwater


On the other hand if you put say..a pic if a three year old on the door...they wont go away.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85673646
United States
06/27/2023 03:25 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Watch how fast they repel when you tell them you're catholic.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86006546
France
06/27/2023 03:46 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Confront them with their beliefs. Use the questions on the Cold Case Christianity website.

I guarantee you, most will be stumped. They could even turn from their apostasy and be saved by the Gospel.

The majority are decent people who see the wickedness in this world, but have been deceived.

[link to coldcasechristianity.com (secure)]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86012707
Australia
06/27/2023 08:33 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door.

Stick finger down throat and vomit on them.

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86012707
Australia
06/27/2023 11:17 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door.

Break their arrogant fucking jaws.

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86013687
Australia
06/28/2023 07:09 AM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door...

Just stare at them and growl.

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86015727
Australia
06/28/2023 04:50 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Wait outside and hit em.with the garden hose.

It never gets old.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86016705
Australia
06/28/2023 09:04 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door.

Throw bucket of runny shit all over them.

Slam door.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85972890
United Kingdom
06/28/2023 09:06 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Two welded steel tubes sticking out the letter box
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86016705
Australia
06/28/2023 09:54 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Two welded steel tubes sticking out the letter box
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85972890


Huh?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79678269
United States
06/28/2023 10:18 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I answer the door in a bath towel and then keep acting like it is slipping off. freaks them out.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86017013
Australia
06/28/2023 10:43 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I like to answer the door and start masturbating.

And saying" sorry cant help it..its a festish ocd thing that ive got for religi types"
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78358985
Australia
06/29/2023 07:53 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
Open door and just stare at them saying nothing.

Then slowly close door.

Burp really loud.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 49053952
Australia
06/30/2023 05:01 PM
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Re: Whays the best way to deal with THE PEDOVAH'S WITNESSESS cult when they come to your door?
I like to answer the door and start masturbating.

And saying" sorry cant help it..its a festish ocd thing that ive got for religi types"
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 86017013


Thats what Brief does.

Copy cat.





GLP