Notes from an "alternate universe". Introduction to a new way of thinking.

A good leader leads from within. Follow your inner authority.

Not a two-bit wannabe commander.

And enjoy the ride.

I never had a favorite drink but I knew about the rule about having favorites so I decided to pretend my favorite drink was orange juice. I also invented other custom personality traits like favorite colors and favorite animals to have an identity and fit in with all the emotional specialness.

Right now humans have been my favorite but I’m thinking of switching for something else. Inanimate materials probably.

Good for you that you embrace change and hold on to your treasures.

I’m not a dragon though I’m more like a chinchilla. I like shiny trinkets such as the kind which make decent elementon for advanced brain compositions


But I’ve been throwing them all away. Their just trinkets and it’s all imaginary anyway

Boo hoo hoo man. I’ll never get my dream because I’m too old now. It’s over. And I’m over it.

Whatch the way I navigate

Ahahaha



Funny enough to cause a scream

You what?

You'll either learn or stay the same, no command.

Good luck with your single based goals in 2021.

When you play with the big boys making big moves you'll only get so far on your own, which isn't very far FYI.

They're what you say they are.

If you believe it is over then so be it.

Stay where you are with the things you have, doing the same things you've always done, lets see what results that brings.

I'm sure Abraham and his wife Sarah also believed that their dream was over because they were too old to conceive.

Learning is not that important man. And I think you already know that???

I can understand giving that kind of commentary to someone who still thinks they need to learn something, as if it really accomplishes anything, but I don't see the point of you telling that to me.

Or maybe you're just using me as a talking post, if so, that's cool just let me know so I don't waste my time reading your responses to my comments.




I don't have to prove anything to you man. Maybe you have something to prove, if so, keep up the hard work.

I don't play with the big boys and you already know that. I thought you said you were smart?



Ah well you see, I considered that scattering the elementon across the landschaft technically counts as chaon whereever they are landing in the brain.

And you see, much of my old dream was a sorry narcisstic one that just doesn't resonate anymore now that im not in the ego trap of looking for external validations or metric of my worth.

You assume I stay and do the same blah blah. What you really want is to modify my behavior, but you've got plausible deniability on your side.

My life is not in trouble, neither is my soul.

But i'll stand by until I've gotten the closure I desire.

I decided not to pursue revenge like you recommended in the past. Just closure.

Man, I used to have this quote thing down, I'm not giving it time tonight.

Learning is important, if you refuse to learn, how will you ever progress? Of course I understand you learn, and you have learnt, probably more than most, that doesn't mean you can take your foot off the gas pedal step up yo game homie!

I'm not looking for proof, I'm not posting for proof, I'm just a simple man asking simple questions giving simple answers.

The big boys are playing with you, are you sure you're not playing with them? But yes, I am smart, it doesn't mean I'm a mind reader wink wink.

Everyone has different goals, as we grow, LEARN and change, as do our goals dreams and desires.

Revenge works, closure works, each to their own I say, just watch out if you run up on me wrong, because I will get you back and I'm aware of others who will also bide their time and strike at an opportunistic moment for something perhaps you've maybe even forgotten allll about.

I prefer to let nature takes its course when it comes to learning and progress. Even if it means I die or society collapses. I accept it.

The big boys can play with me, they can join the fucking club and get in line - might as well - and nothing new for me.

I bet you know something about get struck at an opportunistic moment for something you've maybe even forgotten all about.

I understand with a memory like mine and my terrible personality I'm not short on enemies. Some I even know for sure want to kill me.

That's fine. If I did wrong and someone needs payback, I understand. I deserve it. I only ask that I can understand the reason why, how I wronged them, so at least I can LEARN - I suppose you are right about that then man.

But even if not, maybe it's more satisfying to get a covert revenge well there's nothing I can do about that. I don't have the kind of memory to keep track of these things, and believe me for a long time I tried.

Hunt me, kill me, rape me, eat me. Do whatcha gotta do to get your revenge and/or closure.

I do value justice, even if for some it is not a concept worthy of respect.

But im not kidding that there's already a line of revengers so if somebody is biding their time better hurry or the opportunity will never come. I'm not gonna last long most likely. Good luck!

Justice has to come. The world works in mysterious ways, I find that justice always prevails.

Being passive works, just understand then and accept that you're in the world with others who are not just waiting for nature to take its course and are actively in pursuit of their own learning agenda.

Man, this is the internet, I'm sure there's plenty of people saying a lot of things that they wouldn't dare say to the persons face.

You are not my enemy and I seek no revenge, I'm just saying to YOU that there are people out there not as kind and as forgiving as you appear to be, and their memories are not fog, they're laser sharp.

Being passive is not a choice that’s just the corner I put myself in.

It’s not that my memory is fog it’s just that I am unable to remember things until they become relevant. I can’t go searching in my memory space for things I know, on purpose. My memory was like this since before I tried to wreck my mind.

I’m sure when the time comes I’ll remember what I did or with a simple reminder it will come to me.

I know there’s people like that. And I know there are those who would like to play a sick game with me and have a nice drawn out “conversation” before they kill me. That’s not a fear but a probability.

And that’s been my life for 5 years by this point, it’s my fault, I deserve it and I definitely didn’t make anything better in trying to escape that shit at any cost.

I am pretty forgiving but like I said, my memory is based on what is relevant in the moment. If I don’t have closure, some grudge may live on in there. I’ve had my share of vicious dreams and angry fantasies about society but I never really wanted anyone to suffer.

Jesus said what we imagine in our mind is already real. My imagination was not very nice so I killed it. And my personality is poison so hence my story of how I showed up here. I remember the logic. ‘My effect on the world is detrimental to it so by logic we were all going to hell.’

I really wanted the easy way out to just kill myself, way back then, and now I remember saying this before. But it wasn’t meant to be. I’ve still got a price to pay it seems.

I can’t leave my family to suffer the mess I made.

actually it's 6 years. back in 2015 i fcked everything up. of course i tried to find a way to change reality, because i had no options.

even i train my body and live every day in fear of the worst, i cant control what will happen. and that's the rest of my life like that.

I thought I could move them somewhere new without reference. I really thought I would be able to do it but i ended up messing things up even more.

Its true the asshole is the butt of the joke.

One of the unspoken things about life is that the more you try to help others the more it 'bites you in the ass'.

This is, counter-intuitively, treating that person as someone outside of your own Self.

The cult, very deceptively, tells us to help others and tries to make people feel bad if they don't "give" and "think of others". That is to say, put others first.

Why is this deception? Because you forget how to really help your reality: by changing your thoughts, so to speak.

The way to help the poor and needy IS NOT to give them food and shelter if they did not ask for it. One IS NOT helping them, but hurting them. Why? Because you would then be re-enforcing the idea that you are separate from them. Besides that, you are assuming their role and forgetting yours.

How to really help them? That's the blunder. Why assume that they need help? There are many things in your perspective and reality, not all the same. There is a great variety of things, all interpretations of who and what you really are.

What one is really looking to do is alter their perspective, not help something in their perspective as though it was separate and needed "help".

Violence in some ways is the opposite of charity, but both work to separate your self from your reality. That is why the cult promotes it so much in media.

"Doing good" is about being rational. As is said, it is better to teach a man how to fish that to give him fish. The former is rational (i.e., "good") because it can last longer, while the other is irrational (i.e., "bad") because it cannot survive generations.

The cult wants you to donate clothes, food, etc., because it helps to separate you from your self. They speak nothing about TEACHING OTHERS how to make their own clothes, grow their own food, etc., because that would work against their interests.

And that is why 'helping others' often turns out to have what would be called negative consequences.

Society needs unmentionable scum so the dirty poors can feel better and cleaner about their life situation.

The average rich needs them so they can distract themselves by pretending to be good people, feeling self righteous about their life situation.

If the unmentionable scum kills itself, the dirty poors find themselves at the bottom of the barrel. Everything goes down.

It is better for society that unmentionable scum do unmentionable scummy things and spread chaos and instability because it validates the status quo.

But the unmentionable scum gain nothing from their situation. Unless they believe in the righteousness of martyrdom. Or else, believing in karma, that in the next life it will be different.

I don't want to do anything anymore. This might be it for the closure im going to get.

Thank you for your time.

And you chose to put your self into that corner, so technically it is your choice, the same as every other decision you make or do not make.

Killing your self is the bitch way out, not the easy way.

Stopped reading right there. Not even gonna elaborate on that bold statement? 1 star for you

It's not a choice when the whole picture is unavailable. I wouldn't put myself in this position if i knew better. That's no choice.

Bitch way out, okay. Let's say it your way. It's the bitch way out.

there is no such thing as choice, only possibilities

and the navigation thereof

what it comes down to is

follow nature? God's design

or don't follow nature. <--- Satanism (adversarial stance in relation to God's design which is nature)

No choice. It's not even two options. It's either follow the Will or resist it.

Resistance can give an experience of learning.

It is just an experience.

It doesn't change your behavior later if your nature is to make the same mistake. Learn all you want it doesn't make a difference.

Resist or progress.

Niehter the unmentionable scum nor the dirty rich have any choice. Enlightenment is not democratic. Nobody is special.

It all happened the way it did, according to God's design, including our various propensitites for resisting God's design.

It is fated and inescapable.

The end.

Interesting.

But how does one navigate?

by way of their inner authority

A.K.A choice.

There are lessons to learn along the way for sure. As we know better we make better choices.

Not really, man, but since you are insisting your language you can think about it like that if you'd like.

good for you!

“Decision: the act of or need for making up one's mind. Choice: the right, power, or opportunity to choose. ... Decision comes from “cutting off” while choice comes from “to perceive.” Taking the origins and definitions together, we may gain some clarity”


When you come to a crossroads you cannot take all pathsavailable. Attempting to do so would have you going in circles, spinning your wheels, idling.

A decision is a navigational act that cuts off paths untaken.

A choice is an unit within a dream of possibilities.

Choice is irrelevant until it comes time to make a decision - to navigate - with choices you can dream all you want but in reality at your hopeful choice point maybe none of your dreams will surface as paths for you to take.

Then what is your choices worth? It isn’t worth anything. You still have to make a decision. The movement of space will carry you onwards in your journey. And you will go somewhere.

What choice, Lee? Even if you had the willpower to grind your way through choices to get your life out of the gutter - what of it? So you’re elite. Good for you!

Go enjoy your wonderful life and hurry up about it so, for a loser or two, the story can end sooner rather than later.

I used to know someone who liked to skip ahead while reading a book. I could never understand it, then. I thought - what’s the point of reading it if you already know what’s going to happen?

But at a later point I understood why they did it. It’s because they understood that a story with an unhappy ending is not worth reading.

And even myself, I discovered that there was something comforting about rereading my favorite books. With a brain like mine, I was even able to “un-know” what was going to happen.

At this time i am finally starting to understand what I want. What I want. Not what my network wants or my family wants or even my dog wants.

My desire.

The end.

By telling oneself where to go?

It's nice that you see that. Many people can't understand it. They are told it's bad.

I suppose it's all in your experience of "me"