You're a remarkable treasure, PENG. I hope eventually you will believe it. When you do, then you will find the One who's been searching for you.

And, my Dear, thank you for your sympathy. Some have made assumptions here, and tried to discern who "she" is. That doesn't mean they have figured out who "she" is.

There's nothing wrong with alcohol. Jesus' first miracle was to create more wine to keep a party going. Those wedding festivals in those days were often three day drunkeness and celebration. Ask a historian, not someone with an agenda. Despite that, drinking to excess and then driving makes no sense. Be responsibly. Take turns being the designated driver.