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I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?

 
Anonymous Coward
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08/20/2019 06:11 PM
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I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Trust me, if you start a thread titled this way, you accept all shilling and punitive retribution for sharing such personal and discreet information.


So with that I ask. Is there a way to "learn" the social customs so I dont stand out as much? If it's something concrete and non-contraditory I'm okay. Even with some conflicting data I can usually rationalize a solid placeholder which can serve as a template to build off in the future.


Does anyone else have this problem? It's a case that I can't stay silent as that's interpreted negatively. Then when I do choose to communicate it seems I'm always misinterpreted. Or just "too extra". Or is everyone else an organic portal thinking in 2D? That's not a fair assumption as I'd be incredibly biased having only one mind to compare with.


Help!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 06:12 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
:chaos:
Anonymous Coward
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08/20/2019 06:14 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Try hamburgers. Assburgers just sound nasty.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 06:15 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Try hamburgers. Assburgers just sound nasty.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76844575


If you weren't cognizant of the intentional typo you're too boring and we can't be helpful to each other.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 06:17 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
:assburgers:
 Quoting: HO LEE FUKK


:laf: :cruise3:

:cruise2:

:bigcruise:
Truth Ranger

User ID: 75035479
United Kingdom
08/20/2019 06:21 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Just nod and smile at first. Analyse everything, eye movements, body language, speech patterns - reflect in a subtle way and see if there body language is mimicking yours, when this is the case they are comfortable around you.

You obviously have to hold a conversation of types while doing this, and if it is someone you don't care to interact with - I wouldn't bother acknowledging them in the first place.

Humans are various and weird creatures, but what they don't say with the voice, they say with the body.
-------------------------------------

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin away.

-------------------------------------

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
Anonymous Coward
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08/20/2019 06:24 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
:chaos:
 Quoting: Plato2theGrave


xxxcite
deltaforce

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08/20/2019 06:24 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
You don’t basically.

Most human norms in this age I find repulsive, rude, crass and lack vision

I score the highest score for Asperger’s syndrome testing. I don’t see it as a disability nor a mental health issue, I see normal society instead, is mentally disturbed, Deranged and mentally disabled instead.

I see it as a gift, 3 tests on IQ since a kid. Highest IQ was 144 at 11 years old, most recent IQ test score is 138 ( disappointing as I thought I’d score higher)
Yet we stand idle - We shall never surrender!
Pilgrim001

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08/20/2019 06:26 PM

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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
I can't help you on this. Humans are too complicated for me to understand. I think you're supposed to look them in the eye and have a firm handshake.
I don't have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.



Slake Blake
Anonymous Coward
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Sweden
08/20/2019 06:27 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
You should try the beef bergers.
They're made of soy and specially for you.
Pilgrim001

User ID: 77021014
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08/20/2019 06:29 PM

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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
You don’t basically.

Most human norms in this age I find repulsive, rude, crass and lack vision

I score the highest score for Asperger’s syndrome testing. I don’t see it as a disability nor a mental health issue, I see normal society instead, is mentally disturbed, Deranged and mentally disabled instead.

I see it as a gift, 3 tests on IQ since a kid. Highest IQ was 144 at 11 years old, most recent IQ test score is 138 ( disappointing as I thought I’d score higher)
 Quoting: deltaforce


When your IQ is 140, it's hard to identify with someone sporting 100 IQ. And 100 is "normal".
I don't have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.



Slake Blake
jj johns
J to the 3rd

User ID: 77893365
Switzerland
08/20/2019 06:33 PM

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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
must be difficult op. i don't know what it's like to suffer from this, but i'm a bit introverted myself, so i can imagine.

maybe you can somehow turn this into a positive and unique trait?

good luck
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No clotshot, NEVER!
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Mad as hell!

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Anonymous Coward
User ID: 71388910
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08/20/2019 07:00 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 07:00 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Mine ranges from 138 to higher as well
Its not always a condition of suffering. Sometimes you can really.get immersed I to your own vibe. But that's the thing. I can't even come in physical contact with a cotton ball or I will puke. I feel similarly towards some people. Others I'd really like to break the walls down and have a conversation once in awhile.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 07:05 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
I can't help you on this. Humans are too complicated for me to understand. I think you're supposed to look them in the eye and have a firm handshake.
 Quoting: Pilgrim001


Hands-shaking yes I am hip. What percent of the time/how much attention do you spend on the eye contact?
Truth Ranger

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08/20/2019 07:05 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71388910


Because he is a troll.
Stupid is stupid I guess.

He couldn't learn how to study a humans traits if he put the rest of his life into it.

He should go eat a hot pocket and check his blood sugar levels...
-------------------------------------

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin away.

-------------------------------------

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 77134059
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08/20/2019 07:05 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71388910


It takes a village dude
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 07:06 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71388910


Because he is a troll.
Stupid is stupid I guess.

He couldn't learn how to study a humans traits if he put the rest of his life into it.

He should go eat a hot pocket and check his blood sugar levels...
 Quoting: Truth Ranger


Hot pockets are probably almost as toxic as you are home slice. Wouldn't reccomend either.
MKPitBull

User ID: 76133003
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08/20/2019 07:08 PM

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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Open a burger joint , make the buns in shape of different asses. Call it Ass Burgers . Work hard for 10 years then sell it and retire. Retain rights to AssBurger merchandise. Laugh at all the dipshits that made fun of you.
"Be like water my friend”- Bruce Lee
Anonymous Coward
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08/20/2019 07:08 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71388910


It takes a village dude
 Quoting: Plato2theGrave


Incredible brains trump the village.
Anonymous Coward
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08/20/2019 07:09 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If youre being serious...just sit at a table with a group of people, turn off your thoughts, and mindfully observe the conversation. You dont even have to contribute much. Your brain will absorb their mannerisms gradually over time, particularly if you stimulate positive feelings from the experience.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 07:09 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
It's not actually that I'm being harassed I just sense a huge divide [and yes everyone feels this at times] but it gets to the point of Truman show and eventually I scrap the project and wait till circumstances provide a redux and make new friends all over again.
Truth Ranger

User ID: 75035479
United Kingdom
08/20/2019 07:10 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
If your brain is so incredible, why are you asking us?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71388910


Because he is a troll.
Stupid is stupid I guess.

He couldn't learn how to study a humans traits if he put the rest of his life into it.

He should go eat a hot pocket and check his blood sugar levels...
 Quoting: Truth Ranger


Hot pockets are probably almost as toxic as you are home slice. Wouldn't reccomend either.
 Quoting: Plato2theGrave


But yet you can't stop indulging in either...
-------------------------------------

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin away.

-------------------------------------

You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 77134059
United States
08/20/2019 07:11 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
A belief I hold firmly is that the truth will always lay somewhere in the middle of your perspective. And in fact we are all incredibly average because we are all kinda nuts. So I appreciate the input and dont mean to alienate anyone who isn't actively trolling.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 07:12 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
And if you are trolling that's alright too, its Friday @5pm somewhere in the multiverse foam.
sandman1

User ID: 77035745
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08/20/2019 07:23 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
You don’t basically.

Most human norms in this age I find repulsive, rude, crass and lack vision

I score the highest score for Asperger’s syndrome testing. I don’t see it as a disability nor a mental health issue, I see normal society instead, is mentally disturbed, Deranged and mentally disabled instead.

I see it as a gift, 3 tests on IQ since a kid. Highest IQ was 144 at 11 years old, most recent IQ test score is 138 ( disappointing as I thought I’d score higher)
 Quoting: deltaforce


When your IQ is 140, it's hard to identify with someone sporting 100 IQ. And 100 is "normal".
 Quoting: Pilgrim001


Stay away from areas inhabited by people with a IQ less than 75! Is that racist? don't know!

Cummingsbitc

Last Edited by sandman1 on 08/20/2019 07:24 PM
sandman
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 08:25 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Assuming most people could discern the tongue in cheek value of my thread title. You have to make it a little bit sensational to get attention.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 08:26 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Is it correct to divide talk time evenly between parties engaging in conversation? Say you have 2 neighbors talking to you. Is it good to take 1/3 of the time speaking?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77568399
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08/20/2019 08:28 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
Trust me, if you start a thread titled this way, you accept all shilling and punitive retribution for sharing such personal and discreet information.


So with that I ask. Is there a way to "learn" the social customs so I dont stand out as much? If it's something concrete and non-contraditory I'm okay. Even with some conflicting data I can usually rationalize a solid placeholder which can serve as a template to build off in the future.


Does anyone else have this problem? It's a case that I can't stay silent as that's interpreted negatively. Then when I do choose to communicate it seems I'm always misinterpreted. Or just "too extra". Or is everyone else an organic portal thinking in 2D? That's not a fair assumption as I'd be incredibly biased having only one mind to compare with.


Help!
 Quoting: Plato2theGrave


Just watch others conversing and memorize their lines and their situation, Most conversations are small talk and majority of them are all similiar so know one would know youre using a different part of your brain
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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08/20/2019 08:28 PM
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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
It's like this.

you can be actively following what you assume to be the societal rules of engagement

Then another person breaks a custom. Then what? Free for all? Talk about anything? Or try to coerce them back to the safety zone. People.kind of seem to like spontaneity and that which is novel.



I hope everyone figures this stuff out so we can make a list of etiquette.
Larry D. Croc

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08/20/2019 08:30 PM

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Re: I got ass-bergers. How can I use my incredible brain to learn social customs of humans?
I can't help you on this. Humans are too complicated for me to understand. I think you're supposed to look them in the eye and have a firm handshake.
 Quoting: Pilgrim001


Hands-shaking yes I am hip. What percent of the time/how much attention do you spend on the eye contact?
 Quoting: Plato2theGrave


Less than 12 seconds at a time to be precise. Unless you're moving your point of focus within that time frame you'll go from "glancing" or "looking" or "making eye contact" to a stare, you'll lose focus and come across, unintentionally, as a creep.
"Socialism only works in two places: Heaven where they don't need it and hell, where they already have it." Ronald Reagan

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