Shopping Cart Theory: the ultimate test of whether someone is a dick or a decent person

I have a theory. If you are an active member here you are a dick.

Not only do I take the cart to a collector bay in the parking lot, but I also will always try to straight them and get them shoved together, especially if they are spilling outside the collector bay.

Most people are just too dainty with them when restacking them. You shove those like you are trying to pop them through a brick wall. They are made for that.

A few years working in a grocery during high school and college were useful for some life lessons.

Type A's will fail this test.

The great thinkers and philosophers thought about what makes man good, and what makes an individual man good, if such a man might exist. Some thinkers, like Nietzsche, whom I agree with most, said that there was no good nor evil, that every "evil" urge was still a mechanism for the survival and overall improvement and evolution of man.

And an idiot is equating "good" with the return of a wheeled mechanism for the carriage of extreme amounts of foodstuffs and/or housewares. Fuck a duck.

Postulations such as this are why America is seen as an anti-intellectual country. They contain no real arguments but an argument from inconvenience, which is not a solid or logically consistent argument at all. I say this as an American.

Youre putting someone else out of a job when you return the cart. The staff round up the carst at the end of the day. No carts? Then the guy gets fired.

Eh?

I usually get it to roll into a nice new car and quickly take off before it causes a nice dent!

THIS!!!

I have another theory.

If you frequent GLP all day your one of these.

they have that at the local Aldi market here in the states

is a strange concept but it seems to work- their parking lot never has any stray carts in it

but then again, Aldi treats you like cattle when you are inside the store, so it seems to be part of their theme to control every detail of your behavior

OP is a moran.

End thread.

in detroit 40 years ago they started putting up metal bollards just outside the entrance because people would take the carts home and not bring them back until they went shopping next week

which then led to 'teens' hanging out in the parking lots and soliciting you to pay them to carry your bags from the bollards to your car

and you wonder why so many people fled that city so fast

I purposly leave carts in traffic lanes so beemers and benz get dinged

bwahahahaha

Karma is involved here.

Regardless of the occasional contentious arguments about karma on this very site, let me assure you that Karma is real, with a real life example.

I am a gun counter guy at Guns & Bullets. Some lady ordered a gun on the internet for delivery to our shop. She came in on a day that I wasn’t working, but she was apparently not a nice person. When I came to work the next day, the Guns & Bullets manager asked me what got the woman so cranked up. I wasn’t there, so I don’t know. On the day in question, according to my coworker, Mrs. Wagfinger came in to pick up her piece of shit Glock 26. Mrs. Wagfinger became irate at my associate when she was told that her out of state driver license prohibited the sale, and that she also needed a purchase permit. As I understand it, she became quite irate and had a fit wherein she gesticulated wildly with a lot of side to side and back and forth head movements. “Let me see the manager!” I guess that she became even more pissed when the manager reiterated that Mrs. Wagfinger could not purchase a firearm with an out of state driver license and with no permit.

The catalyst that brought the manager to the floor and inquire about what had transpired is that Mrs. Wagfinger fired off an angry email to corporate headquarters to say that the gun counter people were lazy and incompetent, and that the management refused to help her.

I suspect that after she cooled down from her retarded rant she realized that this is not like the old days. These are ‘Rona days. She needs a gun to protect her amazing 329 pounds of pleasure from nefarious actors that might attempt to possess her godessness without so much as a cup of coffee in an introductory meeting.

She got her state driver license and her permit. I ran the transaction through the National Instant Criminal Background Check System (NICS), and it came back DENIED. It must have been a serious denial from the FBI guy, as it was in all caps. Too bad, so sad. I guess you’ll have to fend off attackers with a can of bug spray.

The moral of the story is Don’t Be A Dick (or the C word). You never know when karma will come around to to bite you in the ass.

Half the time I return it to the cart corral in the parking lot and half the time I take the cart all the way back to the store.

No. The cart retrievers go out periodically and gather up long trains of carts from the cart corrals and drive them back home to the store, gathering up strays when necessary. Now I see their job description has been extended to wiping down the carts with disinfectant.

Good for you.

There should be an experiment done by painting each cart with a Democrat or Republican symbol...

Then see which carts get put back in their respective places...

Democrat Cart Slots...

Republican Cart Slots...

Would be interesting what the Democrats do to the Republican Carts and Visa-Versa...

Even if karma was real, which it isn't, your experience at a retail counter of a gun shop is not original, nor significant. People get denied through NICS all the time, regardless of behaviour at the point-of-sale. Your fundamental postulation is without evidence, merit, or thought, and therefore requires none of the same to disprove it. You're selectively crafting yourself into the position of being a mystic, and like all mystics, your're full of shit.

Further, you're just plain dumb by trying to use this experience to support a fundamentally false conclusion and Buzzfeed-style personality test regarding the return of SHOPPING CARTS. How more stupid can you get? I suspect much more and I eagerly await the entertainment.

Last Edited by It's Just A Ride on 05/17/2020 08:44 PM

Dumbest social justice bullshit I've ever read.

How about the overpopulation theory where you realise the world is overpopulated so you don't breed, dumbass.

By that logic in my area, by littering, you are giving the local jail prisoners a chance to get out and get some fresh air picking up litter
If you want to make those guys happy, toss a pack of smokes and a lighter out right in front of them. I have driven buy them before and they look and make a gesture of smoking to you and point to the ground. The guards watching them will let them smoke if they find a pack on the ground when picking up litter. SO sometimes I go to the store and buy a pack of cheap cigarettes and a lighter and toss it out the window where the guard can not see. I drive a pretty recognizable car so the next time I go by them they will be all smiles and giving the thumbs up.

I'd have decked that smart ass very quickly. That driver had patience.

When shopping cart corrals are several rows away I leave them on the side of the lot also. This parking lot looked the same with minimal corrals.

I won't give the time of day to dumbshit MF'rs like that punk.

100 percent correct. People who cant return their own cart should be launched into orbit.

Thank you! I loathe those fuckers!
I watched a bitch throw a carload (10+) full diapers out in a HEB parking lot last week and speed off.
Wish I could've gotten a clean shot.....

This keeps them employed. Do you want to take their jobs.OP?

Interesting theory, now, check out a grocery store in the hood and note the number of carts NOT in the cart corral....nice!

Yeah unless you go to Aldi's, the fuckers make you deposit a quarter for your cart.

Basically, lady freaked out in public in front of witnesses. The issue about which she humiliated an associate, management, and addressed corporate is that in the end she failed in her ultimate quest. That is karma writ large. If you can't see it, you should stick to jigsaw puzzles for children.

I gave this thread 5 stars but I take it back for believing the FBI and not helping out Mrs. Wagfinger. You could had at least offered her a cup of coffee you dick.

you are right.
that girl is my youngest daughter in her first job at the grocery store.
eight hour days on her feet.
but her father (i love that man...) is tall and strong and likes to get as many stray carts as he can and push them up to the store each time we go shopping.
he does it for her and she appreciates it.
sometimes we make a game of it to see how many he can push, while i help round them up.

there is no reason not to return your cart.
it just means youre lazy and thats all.